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Aug 18, 2002 You can’t control their behavior, but you can nudge them in a less embarrassing direction: Praise, praise, praise the positive. "I love how your dressed" on the good days is much more effective than "What are you thinking?" on the bad ones. Ditto commenting warmly on manners, humor or restraint when they get it right. Admire a role model. "Wasn’t Mark smart to sidestep that political argument?" is a tactful way to let your contentious friend see how it’s done. Be open about your sore spots. "I hate to be teased about my cooking" will get more cooperation than blaming him will. Relax. Most people are so busy judging and controlling their own friends they hardly have time to pay attention to yours. ------------ Teresa Cook is the official "home" columnist for Useless-Knowledge.com. Teresa is a 25 year old homemaker who lives in Idaho. She is married and has two children. Email Teresa: tdcook92@hotmail.com Comment on this column in the forum. ------------ |
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