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Apr 9, 2004 This is a fictional story and phone call to a school, but it may be in fact an omen of what’s to come. My Granddaughter came to my home and told me that her teacher told her class that George Washington was not in fact the father of this country, but was instead George Washington Carver. Me dialing the school’s phone number School person answers: Hello, This is the Michael, Jesse, Jermaine, Randy, LaToya and Janet Jackson place of enlightenment, can I help you? Me: Is this School number 8? Person that answered the phone: I’m sorry, we don’t call this a school anymore, it’s mention of a school may harm someone’s sense of self-esteem, now how may I help you? Me: OK, that doesn’t make sense, but here’s my question; Did a teacher tell my granddaughter that George Washington was NOT the Father of our country, but instead told her it was George Washington Carver? Person that answered the phone:: Yes, that’s true, the NEA (National Education Association ) has ruled that George Washington doesn’t deserve that title and honor, and decided that Mr. Carver was more important to the country. Me: Well that’s absurd, wasn’t Carver renowned for developing innovative uses for a variety of agricultural crops such as peanuts, soybeans and sweet potatoes? How does that overcome the man that led the Revolution against tyranny and British rule, not to mention taxation without representation? Person that answered the phone: Well yes, but you see; George Washington was white, and we can’t have someone of that color getting any credit for anything that may have made this nation better, you see, this attitude is harmful to the self-esteem of all minorities in this nation. Me: Well, the facts are Washington did in fact do all the things I mentioned, are you rewriting history to serve political purposes? Person that answered the phone: We don’t use that term, “history” anymore, it’s offensive to some people in the NEA, it’s now called “Past occurrences of this nation that offends the sensitivities of those subjected to humiliation at the hands of white people”. ME: Oh my God, that’s insane!! Person that answered the phone: Sir, I ask you not to use that offensive language to me, it offends me, and hurts my feelings. Me: What language, what are you talking about?? Person that answered the phone: The reference to God, words that refer to a supreme being have been declared illegal by the wise persons at the NEA. Me: Are you sure this is the school I called, are you playing a joke on me, maybe a April Fool’s day Joke? Person that answered the phone: Sir, I asked you not to use foul language on me, if you insist in this unacceptable behavior I’ll be forced to report you to the police, the word fool is considered offensive to people of limited abilities, and we just can not permit people to be free to make them feel uncomfortable in any way. Me: OK, this is insane, but let’s get back to my granddaughter. How can you teach something that is blindly untrue? You know that General Washington led the American armies in war against the British. That’s rewriting history and it should be stopped immediately. Person that answered the phone: I thought I covered that subject quite well, is there anything else I can help you with? Me: Yes, tell me how she is doing in math, she was always a little weak in that subject. I may be able to help her. Person that answered the phone: What level is the child on? Me: Level? Do you mean what grade? 6th grade I think. Person that answered the phone: We don’t have grades here, a child is placed in a level according to their ages, grades will make a child that cannot perform like the others feel inferior, and we can never allow that to happen. How old is the child, a lot of factors are in play here. Me: She’s ten years old, that should be about right for 6th grade. Person that answered the phone: Ten years old, how many children does she have? Me: What??? Person that answered the phone: At that age, we have to determine if the student has children, how many, and how many fathers, if known, for each child, so we can provide child care and welfare payments while she attends group sessions. Me: Are you insane?? She’s ten years old!! She doesn’t have kids, what kind of family do you think she comes from? Person that answered the phone: We don’t make judgments about situations like that, and anyway, we don’t instruct math, it may be too difficult for some students, and that would make their self-esteem fall, and the NEA simply will not allow that. Me: How can you not teach math, aren’t you supposed to be preparing the kids for the real world, how are they supposed to make change at a store or place of business?? Person that answered the phone: That’s what cash registers are for, haven’t you ever been to McDonalds or Burger King? Me: What if the register breaks, how will they be able to make change? Person that answered the phone: There are always registers at all places, and if there aren’t, they can ask the customer. Me: I really think you and this school are nuts, what exactly do you teach there? Person that answered the phone: May I remind you sir, this is NOT a school, but we teach the students how to be sensitive to other’s feelings, and anything that was taught in those archaic ‘schools’ of the past are lies and should be ignored. After all, we can’t have the children believing that Columbus was a great man, he was a slave trader, and exploited everyone he came into contact with. We also eliminated geography, as the United Nations declared all borders illegal, and President Chelsea Clinton signed the bill co- sponsored by Senators Brittany Spears- Streisand and Clay Akins-Jackson that ratified that ruling by the UN. Science is out too, because we have proven that all persons connected with science in the past were racists, and should be discounted, except George Washington Carver, of course. Me: That’s it, you and this place is crazy, I’m advising my son to take her out of that madhouse and enroll her in a private school where she can get a real education. Person that answered the phone: I’m sorry to tell you this, but private schools have been outlawed, that ruling was a rider in the UN bill I mentioned earlier. Me: Hangs up and cries. ------------ About the author: Mike Romer is a disgruntled resident of New jersey and thinks a lot of people need their heads screwed on properly. He enjoys writing, reading and painting landscapes. Email: triv.fan@verizon.net Tell a friend about this site! ------------ |
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