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Feb 8, 2004 The two biggest losers in the Iowa Caucuses were Dick (Now Dead In The Water) Gephardt and Howard (Big Foot In Mouth) Dean. This shows the power of advertising. Dean and Gephardt were bashing each other in T.V. ads up to a few days before the Caucus. Mr. John (No Bad Ads From Me) Kerry and Mr. John (Nor Me Either) Edwards ended up raking in first and second place over Dean’s very distant third place and Gephardt’s anemic fourth place. Good-bye Mr. Gephardt. The death toll in the Iranian city of bam “may hit” 45,000. Now, there are a lot of people needing prayer and help. Let us hope the world community can respond with everything needed to ease the obvious suffering. Prayer can ease a load of pain. Katherine Harris has decided not to run for a Senate seat. She should probably stay a representative for a while yet. As a junior member of the House, she doesn’t know enough of the dirty tricks necessary to move up to the big time status of a do-nothing-but-gripe-about-the- President Senator. If she really wants a Senate seat; she could move to New York and run against you-know-who. NASA is not going to continue to maintain the Hubble Telescope. They will let it fade into honorable space history and be replaced by the “Webb” scope sometime in the near future. The Hubble has allowed sight into things we can only dream of eventually ever touching. Thanks guys. Thanks Hubble. Mission accomplished. “Grand Ayatollah Ali al-Husseini al-Sistani”; hummmmmm! “Husseini?” I wonder if he is any relation to…Nah! That can’t be. Of course, the beard on Sistani looked very much like the beard Hussein was sporting the day he was dragged out of his hole. “Husseini”; hummmmmmm! This guy’s a cleric. We should get the ACLU over there to explain what the First Amendment…OH! Wait! That won’t work either. The ACLU doesn’t know the meaning of the First Amendment of the American Constitution, and Muslim clerics are stubbornly entrenched in the Seventh century anyway. Just thinking out loud. Sorry. The U.S. is pulling all its troops out of Seoul, S. Korea. It seems there are too many anti- American protests in the city, so it is time to bend over backwards again and let the protestors believe they can bully us and drive us away. What makes anyone think these people don’t know what a bus can be used for? Ever see the mobs that protest things in Washington, D.C.? Yep, bussed in from all 50 of the states. Michael Jackson appeared (again) in court (late) to plead innocent (again) to child molestation charges (again) and then danced on top of his SUV (again) and then invited fans (worshippers of idols) back to “Neverland” (again) for refreshments (Kool-aid). “Mr. Jackson, you have started out on the wrong foot here.” Judge Rodney Melville said.” “There’s strength in numbers, “ said Amber McCrary, 26, who boarded a bus (THERE! SEE? A BUS!) in a Los Angeles K-Mart parking lot” (there’s a shameless plug for K-Mart) HEY! Isn’t that where Martha Stewart’s stuff is sold? I sense a conspiracy here! Anyway, where was I? Oh! Yeah! She boards a bus for the 150-mile trip to Santa Maria to support Jacko. Let the circus begin! The Supreme Court of the United States says that what the Texans did to reverse previous democrat gerrymandering is okay. YEEE-HAW! Git along little donkeys! I wanted to thank Taiwan’s President, Chen Shui- bian for reworking his recent referendum and diffusing the war talk from the Chinese mainland. China has 500 missiles pointed at Taiwan. America has already committed to defend Taiwan against Communist aggression. It is time to take a deep, cleansing breath. Now, what do I think about the recent Cheney- Scalia hunting trip? Well, I think one or the other should have begged off this year. Of course the Vice President is under the most severe scrutiny and Justice Scalia is always under a microscope. He can’t tie his shoes without some demic-rat thinking he’s bending over for someone. This is a lose-lose. Let’s see, if a good friend of mine invited me to go on a hunting and fishing trip to relax and let the world go by without me for a while? Yes, I would go; especially if two great men like Vice President Dick Cheney and Justice Scalia were going to be part of the group. Anybody out there know what “chop squares” are? No. It is not a new kind of breakfast cereal. No. It is not a replacement for chop suey. A “Chop square” is a small area, usually found outside a Muslim mosque, reserved for the purpose of completing the execution by beheading of criminals. The Muslim definition of a criminal in need of beheading is 1) a murderer (OK), 2) a rapist (also, in my book, OK), 3) an armed robber (in the event of the death of any innocent during the crime? Again, OK), 4) a drug smuggler (OK, with only minor reservations because drugs kill) 5) apostasy – meaning, turning away from Islam (SO NOT OK!!!!!) Just know that you cannot be a Christian in Saudi Arabia, the land of Wahhabism. You will be imprisoned, tortured and killed on the shortest of notice, and the ACLU will not bother to send you a defense attorney. ------------ About the Author: Independent, Conservative, Christian. Married 29 years with 5 children raised and one grandson being raised. 30 year Army Veteran and published poet with www.poetry.com since Y2K. Email Michael John McCrae: michael.mccrae@us.army.mil Comment on this column in the forum. Tell a friend about this site! ------------ |
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