On Writing A Horror Novel

Articles

Lanny Grant

On Writing A Horror Novel
Nov 28, 2003

I have taken a break from crusading against liberalism to pen my first novel. It seemed like a good time to do it. The Democrats have lost. Despite every attempt and last-ditch effort to destroy President Bush, the American people have become increasingly anti-liberal. The Dem's have tried everything. They've attempted to make headlines out of what were non-issues: the sixteen words in the State of the Union address; the "outing" of a CIA agent. They've tried to convince the American people that President Bush went to war with Iraq because...name the reason, other than the reasons he listed before he went to war. They've also employed the surefire tactic of winning over the populace by supporting what a large majority of Americans do not: partial-birth abortion and gay marriage.

The fringe special interest groups that once were mere influences now run the Democrat party. The economy is quickly turning around, predicted to surpass the explosion seen under President Reagan. And Hillary wants to run in '08.

Conservatives have won. Finally.

I decided the best use of my time would be to write a novel. I am an avid reader. I always try and keep a balance of political non-fiction, the classics, and "dessert" novels. One of my favorite genres of junk food reading is mass market paperback horror.

Mass market paperbacks are novels that get a limited hardcover release, if they get any at all. For the most part, they go straight to paperback. These horror novels run between 250 to 350 pages. They read very quickly. Some can be read in a single afternoon. A perfect genre for a first-time novelist.

Though I have read a plenitude of these novels, I decided to do some research. I went to my local used bookstore and went to the horror section. I knew the book I wanted to write, but I wanted to see what others were writing. Talk about formula. You can write one too:

Pick one:

a) a haunted house b) a Town with a Curse c) a serial killer d) a creature/monster/demon of some kind terrorizing a specific town, area or location.

Pick your lead, male or female. Now pick their vocation.

a) novelist b) doctor c) lawyer d) unemployed, but somehow manages to eat and pay bills during the course of the book.

Now pick the set up:

a) they return to their hometown after being away for years b) they move to a new town which is "cozy," "quiet," "peaceful," "perfect," and "nestled" somewhere

Now chose where this town is located.

a) a bay b) a cove c) a lake d) a pond e) the ocean f) mountains g) woods h) the desert i) a swamp

Now chose the reason why they relocate to the town.

a) to start a new life after a husband/wife/child/parent/sibling dies via car accident/illness/suicide/murder b) a happy family just decides to

Finally, no soup is complete without Stock

a) the evil mayor/teacher/sheriff/preacher/parent b) the troubled teen(s) c) the angelic teen love interest d) the geeky/nerdy/smart/outcast best friend e) the bland, faceless hero or heroine f) the one or two "colorful" characters, defined by one or two eccentric traits g) a serial killer who is more brutal than the one that was in the last book about a brutal serial killer h) a creature that "eviscerates" "disembowels"

Add copious amounts of blood, creative murders, a little risqué material if need be, half-bake on the Strict Genre setting on your stove, and a couple of months later you will emerge with your very own mass market paperback horror novel.

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