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 Holly Winter Living The Life Of Holly June 2, 2003 “Where are you, sweet Ralphie?” I asked into the phone. “In the crash pad. New York. Queens. In bed. Alone. Are you sad for me?” “No. You can use the break.” “Hey. I don’t need a break. I need a girlfriend. “Where did you fly today?” “Rochester. Fort Lauderdale.” “Anything interesting?” “No. No nice snow to land in. I love landing in snow. No snow.” “Anything interesting in the back?” I missed flight attending. I liked to get reports on the backity, back, back. “A passenger threw up into the seatback pocket, himself, the floor and the aisle. Oh. The flight attendants were pretty mad. I think that they expect me to land the plane and help them clean it up.” “If you were a nice pilot you would.” Ok. Maybe I don’t miss it that much. “What’s going on with Darlin-man?” He asked. “He sent me a dozen roses today.” “He did?” “Yes. All colorful. They’re incredible. “Man. That’s it. You are going to get married. I know it.” “Hey.” I paled. “Ralph. You’re not funny.” “Are you going to wear white at your wedding? I don’t think you should. You’re far from pure.” “Ralph. That’s it. You are never, ever going to meet him. You’re cut off. In fact. You are never going to e-mail him or talk to him on the phone. In fact. You are forbidden from ever, ever calling me again.” “I wonder where the wedding will be? Probably in New York, near your family.” “Hey. You know what? I think that I am going to run over to your house and download some digital photos of me onto your computer. Let’s see how many do you think will fit?” “Your mom will want to meet him first.” “Maybe I will poster your house with some full size photos of me. You know. So that your future girlfriend can wonder who I am. I will sign the photos with big X’s and O’s.” “Does he know that you will want to invite at least eight hundred people to the wedding?” “Then I am going to call your parents and tell them that you and I have been married now for two years, but you were afraid to tell them. We made up the allusion of friendship, just as they feared, because you didn’t want to deal with their wrath.” “Game over.” He laughed. “You sure honey? I’m just warming up.” “I have to desensitize you about this whole marriage idea, or else you are going to be single forever.” “You know what Eliza did? When we walked over to the restaurant to make reservations for my reunion date with Darlin-man? She announced that I was to dine there the following evening with my future husband. I almost punched her in the stomach.” “See. You need to lighten up about the marriage deal. Why are you so uptight?” “It wasn’t funny. I was terrified that we would show up at the restaurant and the hostess would congratulate us on our engagement. I didn’t even know if I was going to finish eating dinner with the man.” “So. You could have laughed about it.” “That wouldn’t have been easy to explain.” I said, weakly. “That would have been great conversation for your date. When is the engagement party going to be?” He chided. “Ralph?” “What?” “You’re not funny.” “You need to lighten up.” Yeah. No. I needed to change the subject. “Hey. Guess what?” “What.” “He’s invited me to go with him to the Cayman Islands next week.” “Who did?” “Darlin-man.” “He did?” “Yes.” “Well. Want to know what I think?” “What.” “Bad idea.” He bristled. “Because…” “You don’t have any money.” “He’s treating.” “Holly, You need to spend more time together, here, before you travel. Let him go alone. Tell him you’ll go with him next time.” “No way. Why shouldn’t I go?” “Holly. He just broke up with you. Now he snaps his fingers and you’ll do whatever he says?” “It’s not like that…” What if he had someone else lined up to go, and she backed out? Do you want to be second choice?” “No.” “Tell him, no.” “Hey. Ralph. Come on. Is there any woman in your life that you would want to spend five days with on a beach?” “No.” “Exactly. If he didn’t want me to go, he wouldn’t ask me to go.” “This doesn’t feel right to me. It doesn’t feel right at all.” “I know. I wish that he had mentioned it before we broke up. He says that he had been planning it for a while.” “I don’t want to see you get hurt.” “Hello? Ralph? I don’t want to get hurt, either. But. If he decides that he doesn’t want to spend time with me, he will let me know. There’s nothing I can do about it.” “That’s true… but…” “I like him. I like spending time with him. Come on. If he wanted to spend time in the mountains, I would go with him. He’s trying to make things better. This could be a good time for us to figure out if we want to spend more time together.” “I know. Just watch yourself.” “Hello? Who do you think you are talking to here?” “I don’t want to see you get hurt again.” “Oh. I want to get hurt. That’s my goal. Come on. Should I sit in a little bubble so I don’t get hurt?” He was quiet for a minute. “Why don’t you date a bunch of people, including him. That way he couldn’t hurt you, and you could have a little fun when he’s on call.” “I don’t work that way. You know I don’t work that way.” “You bore me. For a best friend you’re so boring.” “Ralph. You’re exciting enough for the both of us. Believe me.” ------------ About the author: Holly Winter is a teacher and a writer and a flight attendant living in Denver, Colorado, USA. She can be reached at her website or email: Holly@livingthelifeofholly.com Comment on this column in the forum. ------------ |
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