Miracles Are Known To Happen, Right?

Articles

Holly Winter
Living The Life Of Holly

Miracles Are Known To Happen, Right?
Aug 16, 2003

“Holly?” He asked in his most annoyed voice. “Didn’t they tell you the rules of this class when you signed up?”

“No.” I gurgled through my lemonade. Ok. I’m guessing no drinking in here.

“THEY DIDN’T TELL YOU THE RULES?”

“No. They didn’t.” I said, calmly.

“How are you supposed to make it in this class if you don’t know the rules?” He asked, pacing back and forth in front of the white board.

Man. This was a voluntary class. I had saved rolls and rolls of pennies to take it. No. I didn’t think I would be able to design my own website without some tech-ie sitting next to me positioning the mouse and opening and closing the files. But I’d hoped to be better qualified to boss around whomever I hired to design my site. And. Who knows? Maybe I’d learn more than I bargained for. Cause. You know. Miracles can happen, right?

The instructor grabbed a dry erase marker. “Rule number one. Holly. Are you listening?”

“Yes.” Um. Why was I being targeted? There were three of us in class. All women. Beth had a Diet Coke on her desk and he was ignoring it. Why was he picking on me?

“Write down these rules.” He said, gruffly.

I grabbed a pen.

“Rule number one. CHEAT.”

Oh. Ok. I like that rule. I turned to Pam who was sitting next to me. She had written Cheat into her notebook with a big question mark. So I wrote cheat into my notebook with a big exclamation point. Hey. I can meet this requirement.

“Rule number two.” He said. “Pam, are you listening?”

“Yes.” She answered quickly.

“Rule number two is: Make mistakes.”

Oh. Wow. A course designed for me. Mistakes were my motto. Well. Maybe they weren’t my motto but they were aligned to the “Holly” way of life.

“Rule number three. This’s the most important rule. Holly. Are you with us? Have we lost you yet?”

“Not yet.”

“Good.” He laughed. “Rule number three. HAVE FUN.”

Oh. Wow. I don’t care how much I paid. I could do this. I grabbed my drink. A day sipping lemonade couldn’t be all bad no matter how overwhelming the subject matter.

I had tried to hire someone to create a new website for me. I sent pleas of interest and the promise of lots of money to five different web designers. Well. Let’s just say that two weeks later I hadn’t had even one promising meeting. I had two people who appeared to be chronic re- schedulers. The other three made every attempt to corner me into a boring conventional website that was their specialty. Um. Yawn. No thanks.

My web design class got to work setting up our training website. We set up the root files. We packed them with graphics and text. We built page after page. We made templates. We linked pages. We added e-mail addresses. We put in some anchors and pop up windows. I was pretty impressed with how much I was learning. I kept waiting for my computer to shut down or electrocute me for trying something outside the word processing programs I frequent. But. My computer didn’t seem to notice that I was working beyond my realm of expertise.

“Ok. Now. Save your work.” The instructor instructed.

“It won’t save.” Pam worried.

“Me neither.” Sandy panicked.

“Mine worked.” I said, surprised that I might be the one chosen to have the right thing happen. I know. There was no glow over my head, but my program had programmed. Where was the Hallelujah chorus?

Pam leaned over to check. “Yup. Holly’s is working. The writing on her screen is all white now.”

The instructor was confused. “It can’t be. We were making a template. You can’t make changes to a template without unlocking it. Holly. Are you in template mode?”

“I am.” I said, a little scared that I had broken the computer.

“Just remember this.” He joked. “Sometimes things work when they aren’t supposed to. And sometimes things don’t work when they are supposed to. Holly. You got lucky this time. Enjoy it.”

Yeah. Each of the non-examples worked on my computer for the whole six hours. I know. I found it encouraging. So. I went home and got to work. No more training website. It was time for me to work with my Living the Life of Holly information.

I opened the program. I picked a starting point. I started toying with various strategies. I built my home page. I tried a pop up page. I fit in some anchors. I slid in some photos. I managed links to other pages and links to my own site. I worked through the night, terrified that if I stopped I might forget everything I’d learned. I doubted that the site would actually work once it was published. But I wasn’t deterred. Maybe it would work. Wouldn’t that be funny?

Each day I put in more hours. I made a template for columns with photos and a template for columns without photos. I made a reader response form so that people could send comments directly to me. I made a survey form so readers could choose their favorite columns.

Launching the website will be a bit scarier than creating it, so I decided to put it off till next week so I could live in my maybe fantasy a while longer. I was having fun feeling like a web designer and didn’t have a clue how I would handle the site not working.

The instructor said I could call him if I needed help. Yeah. I know. It was nice of him to offer, but how will he explain to his wife when I start calling every five minutes because my website was laughing at me? No. I had to figure this out on my own.

If it does work, this will be my last column on Useless-Knowledge.com as I will start posting my columns on my site, and e-mailing them out to people via my Yahoo Group as a free service. Stay tuned via the Yahoo Group for my book of columns that will be out in the next year. I have adored my time here at the UK and will sadly leave it for my own bit of cyber space with room for columns.

So. This weekend I’ll travel to never-never land knowing upon my return that I might be launching a new website of my own making. Hey. Stranger things have happened. Ok. Maybe never on my computer.

But. Let’s keep an open mind. Because. You know.

Miracles are known to happen.

(A photo to go with this column will be available and archived on my Yahoo Group. It can also be found on my website until the new site is launched.)

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About the author: Holly Winter is an adventurer who has become known for sprinkling humor through her extraordinary life that continues to entertain the many thousands of fans here at Useless-Knowledge.com. Whether she is giving advice to the new mayor of Denver, swimming with sting rays at the Cayman Islands, or dealing with the side effects of her epilepsy medication, you will find her positive take on the world to be the perfect accompaniment to each and every part of your week. Look for Holly’s columns every Saturday. Be sure to sign up for an e-mail reminder when her column has been posted at her Yahoo Group where a photo will be posted that goes along with the column. Send a blank e-mail to livingthelifeofholly-subscribe@yahoogroups.com You can contact Holly at her website Livingthelifeofholly.com or email: Holly@livingthelifeofholly.com

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