Can't Think of Anything to Write About...

Articles

Craig Chamberlain

Can't Think of Anything to Write About...
Jan 3, 2004

Yes, my good friend writers block has come to visit once again. He's difficult to work with, it is a one word at a time thing, very slow work, and then when you finish he whispers in your ear"that's terrible" and like someone who has been brainwashed you just nod in agreement and delete the whole thing. But here I am plodding along anyway. Maybe something will come to me.

I went and saw "Return of The King" last night in the theater. For anyone who hasn't seen it, GO SEE IT! Even if you are only vaguely familiar with Tolkiens writing this movie is worth it. Over 3 hours long it doesn't seem like it. Usually I sit in the movies checking my watch. Gods and Generals had a more severe effect on me and left me in a catatonic state for a while.

Well 2004 is upon us, another election year, I think we need to amend the constitution we don't have nearly enough non election years. But I suppose that would drive a political junkie like me beserk, if I didn't have something to predict comment on or gloat over republican victories.

I think the year will be full of suprises. Carolyn Mausley Braun will pull a suprise upset and win in Iowa, after her victory she will say to reporters: "I knew my message would connect with the voters, I'm just glad they ignored it and supported me anyway, by the way, what is my message?"

Howard Dean will win in a landslide in New Hampshire but will lose steam after he demands that reporters refer to him as his royal highness, and says "if George W. Bush thought Saddam Hussein was a tyrant, he ain't seen nothing yet" After making this statement Wesley Clark surges in the polls but the guys at moveon.org still endorse dean.

Sen. Edwards will threaten suit if not given a primary win somewhere.

Bob Graham wins in South Carolina after the voters take on look at the ballot and write him in.Graham sputters something that makes no sense whatsoever, but the media will say he's brilliant and call George W. Bush a moron.

Out of desperation the democrats nominate Alec Baldwin and Dennis Kucinich. They go on to lose 49 states and the day after election day, the New York Times headlines says "country still divided politically"

Liberals will finally slip up one day and speak out of code. Instead of saying "progressive" they will accidentitally say "were going to rob you idiots blind and call it a tax hike"

Now onto other things. Ever watch tv that put you in physical pain? If not then its hard to explain, but it happened to me as I watched my beloved WVU mountaineers get killed 41-7 in the Gator Bowl. If I could have found my baseball bat I would have used it on my TV. You see? Writers block. I couldn't think of a thing.

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