HOME | POLITICS | SPORTS | LIFE | SCI/TECH | OPEDS | HELPFUL TIPS
|
Mar 18, 2004 I was nineteen when adulthood began to take its toll. Sick of going through jobs like a bear goes through hikers, tired of being demanded what I'm going to do with my life by well-meaning relatives, thuroughly irritated by friends proclaiming at parties that I was "cut-off" that night, I came to a decision. That night, I walked up to my mom and said "From now on, I'm going to be five years old again." She didn't belive that I was serious of course, but I was determined. That next morning I watched Saturday morning cartoons and ate Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Nothing out of the ordinary yet. It was then that I made my gambit, pulled for my ace. I went to play with Barbies. Naturally boredom ensued after five minutes, but I kept playing for 45 minutes to prove my point. Leaving a path of tiny plastic shoes and faux fur coats in my wake, I went outside to play with my sidewalk chalk. The day went on like this until dinnertime. Apparantly, my parents had different ideas on how to handle their little "situation." I was always being called the "situation," I think they've forgotten my name. My dad took the sensitive route. Apparantly I should Cut The Crap and Get My Act Together. My mom thought offering to let me practice driving would get me to get said act together. When I got excited she said, "Yes, I knew it! I knew you'd change your mind." I just looked at her very innocently and said "But mommy, what widdle kid wouldn't want to dwive a caw?" I had never seen a human person deflate before. So that's what it looks like. For the rest of dinner, various forms of threats, bribery and extortion were used, hoping I would change my mind. When the subject of my upcoming birthday came up, and it was brought to my attention that five year olds don't go to clubs for their bithday, I remembered something: Jaime's party was that night. I thought of the one thing I had wanted, that she wouldn't do. Turning to my mom, I said "Mommy, I wiw be a big girl again if you pay fow my dwivuws ed?" "By gods, yes!" she exclaimed. "Thanks." I said, kissing her on the cheek. "Well, I'm off to Jaime's house, I won't be home until tomarrow!" ------------ Email Lindsey A. Monyelle: rdwnggrr119@msn.com Tell a friend about this site! ------------ |
||||||
|
|
|||||||
|
