The Boston-flirt

Articles

Chris Falcon

(Welcome To ChrisCam) The Boston-flirt
July 31, 2003

"What are you running from?" says the Boston- flirt.

"You." I tell him.

"Or do you mean you're running TO me?"

"Nope."

"Why are you running from me?"

"Because you're the Boston-flirt." I say.

He laughs. But I only know he is laughing by his typing the letters "lol."

He and I are writing to each other by e-mail.

Lol are the letters you use to show you are laughing out loud..when you are reading or writing on line. And he and I have both been using "lol" a lot.

He is the e-harmony guy I met on line a few months ago..and this flirt discussion is not what I had expected tonight...He was Mr. Wonderful since he started writing to me in May..now the flirting topic..is making me choke a bit even though I am laughing too.

This Saturday is our first date. We have never met.

By character he is great.

Well, I guess I will let you know the next day...this Sunday.

In the meantime, I am apprehensive. I went from total elation about him to wondering if I am nuts....just because of the flirt comments.

Typical woman overreaction? Or am I being insightfull and noticing red flags?

One of my best friends married the greatest guy from meeting him on the internet. She is blissfully happy and in love, still listening to Enya and sleeping on white cotton sheets with a man with powerfully sweet blue eyes and the kindest heart I ever encountered.(He dug through the rubble with me, after my house burned down).

So..I don't feel the stigma some people feel about meeting someone on line.....but I do bascically I feel a back and forth opinion..

I could be driving out of the city in my blue Kia with all the empty junk food wrappers and the bycicle in the back....and stop to pick a tired old road-side daisy... take a whiff... and then count off flower petals with, "This is crazy...This is not...This is crazy....This is crazy....This is not..."

I really don't know...I change my mind from elation to questioning myself about my sanity and my judgement often, since since I met him on line in May.

"I'm the Boston-firt, huh? Has a definate dangerous ring to it," He says.

"Yeah. Know why?"

"Why?"

"Because you ARE dangerous."

"Am not."

"You are. You just admitted it to me."

"No, I said I we are both flirts. We both are and we both know it."

"Oh? And how do you know this?" I ask.

"I have experienced it. You're good." He types back to me.

"This information is prividged to you. So how would you know I am a flirt with other people?" I ask.

"I have a strong hunch. I've sized you up. I'm a good judge of people. It's obvious. You're a flirt."

"You are so digging your own grave, Signor Boston- flirt, Because I am not a flirt. And you just admitted you are... and I have it in writing. Don't brag about flirting it won't help. Having personality is different from being a flirt."

"What's the difference between having personality and being a flirt?" He asks me.

"Personality, my dear, draws people....innocently. Flirt entices people by device," I type back to him. "Personality is like being drawn into a force ...it's like gravity....or ....a magnetic field drawing you in."

He is stumped by my typing this and he changes quickly to my way of seeing things. He suddenly is backing down a bit on the flirting thing and saying he sees things a new way.

I am mulling over to myself...all kinds of things..like is he seriously reconsidering...was he completely joking the entire time...am I the grumpiest person in the world?....

But also thinking I don't think I am into talking to people just to feel good about myself. I don't smile at a guy so that he can make me feel like I am special.

I smile at people to be nice.

And I would also smile to an old woman.But how have I gotten to this point? Why am I saying these things? Pursuing this topic?

I was almost about to have a fight with Internet- guy..the big Boston-flirt before I have even met him?. I could feel it brewing.

I was trying to stop myself. But there went my fingers, typing totally without my permission.

I know better than to pursue things like this..potential let's say...discord.... I really had no point though....I was just messing with him after a certain point.

I am totally avoiding the topic of telling you who he is too.

You would know his name.

But ..now....I will have to tell you about that another day...the flirting thing has me too close to the edge.

I could meet him and be terribly hurt.

And then I would have to say o I met so and so and you know him, and he dumped me....But...

He says he could be hurt too, if I don't like him. We shall see.

We are meeting this Saturday, you would think I could resist acting like a nagging wife before I even meet the Boston-flirt, right?

I am divorced. And because of it, I learned not to take a man for granted. So I need to pull myself together and not fall into that.

I can hear, for example, a women complain that her husband isn't coming home until late...maybe even 10 o'clock..or I hear a woman complain that her husband is on a business trip for days....and she says how she is all alone with all the work...and I want to say to her....You have to wait until the weekend? "My husband is never coming home."

I learned a lot since we divorce.

I learned we all have faults.

I learned there is nothing I can do to turn the clock back and have my husband back.

But I WOULD do ANYTHING to turn the clock back and not be a spoiled housewife. Okay, okay it was NOT the reason for our break up. But...still..I think it's important to look inside yourself...and I would still do anything to let my ex-husband understand I am sorry.

I would go back.He could say, "Will you..." And I would say, "Yes, yes," before his sentence was finished.

I have learned I am not perfect. We all aren t and therefore should give one another a break.

Through divorce, I have learned not to focus on the faults of others, but to focus on my own faults instead.

I have learned if you really care about someone...you don't interpret things in an insulting way...you take it for how it was meant....

I have learned it is great to laugh as much as possible, but never at the expense of others.

I have learned people are more important than things. Always.

So...anyway...back to Boston-flirt...

I will be trying not to make the same mistakes I made in the past.

So...let me see....I haven't met him...should I be picking on the flirtation comments and going with it? Nope.

Every, every, everything has been wonderful about getting to know this guy since last May.

I am looking forward to meeting him.

I will be in my long, black and white dress and sandals....with my hair hanging all around me...at a narrow, funky, Mexican restaurant ...crunching on salty Mexican chips, and drinking Sangria in the city.

I will let you know what it is like.

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About the author: Chrissa Falcon is a newspaper reporter in the New York Metropolitan Area. Chrissa may be reached at ChrisFalconColumn@hotmail.com

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