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Sept. 1, 2004 Every American has the right to gamble. We have moved affirmative action forward by affirming this with the vast proliferation of casino gambling in this nation. Thereby doing two things; 1) affirming affirmative action, that it works and it helps them who have been historically wronged and 2) proving that we like to give our money away ias long as there are lights and bells and whistles and the roar of the crowd to send it off. I as do my fellow Americans like to gamble, sitting there benumbed of mind and thought as quarters drop into machines that sometimes pay off greater than what I’ve put into them but mostly not. This is why Monaco and it’s insidious monarch must be stopped. Monaco is draining our resources by seducing the wealthiest gamblers among us to go there instead of spend their money here with the madding crowd. The hordes of gamblers in their Bermuda shorts that ride to their naval and their sandals and white socks must be allowed to rub elbows with the formal attire of them who play ten thousand dollar a hand baccarat. We can defeat this puny nation that is doing so much harm to us by threatening our new found wealth by invading them and putting the dictator on trial. This must be so because the free booze and free rooms over looking the Mediterranean sea that are given to the winners are the lure that draws so much of the gambling revenues from our indigenous populations which have spent so much time and money acquiring the right to have gambling halls. We have no Mediterranean sea but we do have Lake Huron and Michigan that would easily support a few free rooms to hang a tuxedo in. We may never win the war against Monaco but we will always have Huron and Michigan and we can start the war which is the first step in accomplishing our goal of keeping gambling revenues, if not in the hands of the government, at least they will stay in this country. We of the LCLRaC party (load of crap party {still not an acronym}} know this must be done to secure for ourselves the freedom from that oppression of knowing that Monaco and other places like it are out there waiting…just waiting to strike terror into our gambling industry. When they have seduced the meanest of us away to their shores and have robbed us of the will to fight for one of our most important industries they will have beaten us; that can not be allowed to happen and we must strike now before it does. You must feel the fear for your future now! You must open your eyes and see that the maniac monarch of Monaco is after you and your security. It will not be an easy war, or one that we will ever win but I think we can win it even if we never know that we have won. We will go in there and run them down and bowl them over and when we have deposed the dictator we will be hailed as heroes and then my friends we can impose the lifestyle the oppressed people of Monaco deserve. We must do this because no one else will; even if we fail at least the world will see our resolve and they will have to respect that we will do whatever is necessary to protect ourselves and two of our most important streams of revenue. The first being the gambling industry and the second being the manufacture of weapons. You must realize that our disposable society has filtered down to the weapons industry also and that if we do not find ways to dispose of the disposable weapons then more can not be made and sold to them who need to use disposable weapons. But as a peace loving man and a Buddhist Christian follower of the Lord Krishna you have to see that is it not a light thing I say when I say we must go to war to protect that which is ours. It is not lightly that I as the leader of the fourth major party in this nation set out to invade Monaco. But it is with a determination that is un-shakable that we set out to right this wrong. The people of Monaco have pined for freedom from the capricious whims of that ruthless man and he is just a man one who will make a good defendant when we capture him. On November the second when you are in the voting booth, think on the poor children of Monaco and think about the hateful oppression that dictator is exporting to other places and think about the cost he has imposed on our casinos by taking the big ticket gamblers away from them. Don’t think about the cost of our children’s lives for they will have died in a higher purpose but think of those poor suffering souls in Monaco, but don’t think of them as people who have never risen up to take care of their own internal problems just think of them as people who yearn for freedom from despotism. We will win (maybe) someday and when we do win we will have shown the world our resolve but your resolve must start when you write me in on every line of every ballot then we will start our trek towards not only our own freedom from terror but theirs as well. Besides as Commander and Chief I want to fly onto the deck of an aircraft carrier with mission accomplished signs on it. Then when there is finally peace in the world from our war on terror (we may never know when the war is over) I will turn the carrier into a presidential yacht; one befitting the worlds best protected gambling nation. Thank you for your vote and remember the Load of Crap Party is there for you after I secure what is mine. ------------ About the author: Mark C. Durfee is an independent conservative liberal hedonist Christian Bhuddist deveotee of Krishna who follows no crowds and who thinks that the Viagra commercial with Freddy Mercury singing while a bunch of men dance is funny. His novels are nothing like his articles and they cannot be found at Barnes and Noble or Walden books, Amazon.com or your local independent bookstore because he has not been discovered. His favorite saying is "Duck!!! That drive-by may have your name on it!" Email: mcd5255@hotmail.com Tell a friend about this site! ------------ |
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