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May 23, 2004 Many of us have given up our free time in an effort to give our children the things we never had. Who came up with that theory and why do we all fall prey to it? Parents begin with only the best of intentions. Our children's smiles melt our hearts and we quickly fall victim to the warm feeling that gift giving evokes. To provide food, clothing and shelter we struggle to cope with hectic schedules, high costs and growing children. As we add sports, dance lessons and camps, many parents even work two jobs. In turn we miss their games, recitals and class plays. Later we begin to placate our guilt for not being there, by buying them something. In turn our sweet children have grown into teenagers that have mistakenly begun to believe things are owed to them. In our attempt to give them what we feel they deserve we have created a society of young adults with high expectations and low motivation. They are used to having something for the asking and getting it! How many of you parents have bought your children every video game from nintendo to x-box as the technology improved? No, this is not every parent or every child. Many kids are growing up into ambitious, hard working young adults. Yet, it is an area of great concern for more kids than you realize. Don't get me wrong, most of these kids are not bad or in trouble. But, as both a parent and employer I have seen examples first hand. They have less respect, less incentive and less desire to improve their lot in life. And why should they when we have handed everything to them? They want instant rewards, instant answers and instant gratification. Did we really have it so bad because we had to work and go to school? The household chores we complained so loudly about, actually came in handy when we moved out. And what about those early morning paper routes, did they ever kill anyone? You've all heard those exagerated stories about those long walks to school, maybe that is what kept us in shape. So we shared one television, one phone and one bathroom...we all survived. Many articles today say that kids do not get enough exercise. Maybe if we cater to our children less and have them walk or work a bit more we will accomplish two things. A longer less stressful life for ourselves and a happier, more productive life for our kids. In the end by giving them less perhaps we will really be giving them more. ------------ About the author: Laura James is an author of romance. You can read all about her and her book Secret Illusions at her website laurajames.org or email: LauraJames@authorsden.com Tell a friend about this site! ------------ |
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