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Nov. 12, 2004 Just to head off some of the left's crazy conspirists I'm sure Yasser Arafat didn't make a deal with President Bush to die if he won the election. Of course you can bet some of the loony left will try finding a connection. Look, the guy was real old. His people are a little nuts themselves. They freakin' blow themselves up in the name of religion. Who's to say he didn't just get tired of hangin' around waiting for all those celestial virgins? (Note to future suicide bombers: There are VIRGINS in HEAVEN? They didn't put out on earth and what makes you think they'd want to do it with you? Hellloooo! After you blow yourself up are you gonna look real good? Nooooo! Besides, if these are heavenly virgins then how do you know they CAN put out? Hmmmm? Look, they didn't get to be celestial virgins for nothing. Besides, they might be UGLY. Who knows? I'm not gonna blow myself up to find out.) Sure...there's some nutballs on the left will draw some conclusion from this. Listen, if this were the case wouldn't Mr. Arafat waited until after the inauguration? I would think so, but maybe being a crazy person (kinda looks a little like Mickey Moore in a towel, don't ya think? Or don't ya?) Maybe he, like the crazies on the left coast, wanted to get out before hand. Then again, like I said, he was old. Maybe it was just his time to go. Let Peter Jennings sort it out. (Sorry, Dan, you had too much stress lately. Think about the chicken ranch. Okay?) ------------ About the author: Lee Zelhart is a proud graduate of McKendree College in Lebanon, Illinois and the father of two teens (one of which will be getting married in the next couple of years, maybe sometime in 2006) and the author of The Ghost of the Cavalier due out in 2005. Email: graphicsdoctor1@sbcglobal.net Tell a friend about this site! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
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