Fast Food Fooey

Articles

Fast Food Fooey

By Bob D. Caterino
May 23, 2005

I went to the fast food joint today. Why torture myself you say? It must be the gluten for punishment syndrome. How many times did I go into one of these fast foodratoriums, place an order and when I get home find the fries are missing or a pie or even the burger? Every time in fact these morons can’t seem to get it right. I think I am being too harsh though. I know their getting minimum wage and these corporations can’t get real people to work there. I know that it takes a smarter person to read the order and place items in a bag.

   Talking about giving someone the finger, one of these fast food eateries were in the news today oh boy. It seems that we had another finger in the batch of soy filled saw dust that they are calling meat these days. Usually these finger foods are dispelled after a while but never does one of these places admit to placing that same said finger in the food. Now the place named is giving away free milk shakes for anyone that walks in. I think a nice frosty thick shake is just what I need to wash down the finger sandwiches and toe fu.

Now I think it is time to disperse another myth. Why are these and I do mean all of these places called fast food???   You usually have to wait until the cashier finishes telling her joke to the troll like woman standing at the register next to hers or his. Now it is your turn to order and they make you repeat your order five times before they get it right. Now is this isn’t enough they will repeat your order back to you then you get yet another chance to tell them they got it wrong again. Now after ten minutes of cleaver conversation and I do use the term in the most improper form, they get it right so you think. Now you get the delicate nuptials home and open the bag and poof it is pure magic. Yep the fries mysteriously disappeared. For the finally your hamburger with extra onions and pickles has changed to a dry two day old chicken sandwich. Most of us would get angry but eat the food anyway and chalk it up to bad cook night but not I.

Here is what I would and have done in the past. I head back and look at the faces when I fume at the manager. They don’t expect anyone to come back in and that’s why I do it. Now before I walk into the place I eat the sandwich they gave to me. I take the empty wrapper and fill it with napkins and wrap that up to look like the sandwich. I return it and say this isn’t what I ordered and hand the bag to the manager. She tells the cook to make me whatever I want on the house. He or she does what he or she is told. Now the manager hands me my food and I start heading out. The manager looks in my bag and yells to me to stop. She informs me that the hamburger was filled with napkins and I simply say “I know and as I said that’s not what I ordered.” I leave there in a hurry.

This is equivalent to someone eating half a steak and telling the waiter it is too tough and getting a new whole steak, only with a get even mindset. I think we all should walk into these places with this attitude. If they say they are fast then they should be. If they say you can have it your way then you should be able to get what you want. Lets make these places live up to there name. If more of us stand up for ourselves then they will be forced to change. I mean I don’t want the manager telling me the coffee is cold for a reason. He claimed that he couldn’t heat it up for me because he didn’t want a law suit. I put the cold coffee on his counter and walked out. I think I am done with fast food and heading towards more home cooking. At least I will know what I am getting and when I am getting it. Now where is my steak medium with onions on the side and a heaping helping of mashies with gravy and corn on the cob. My, oh my. Later reader, I’m out to lunch.

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About the author: Bob D Caterino is a writer that we all either hate or love. His work can be found at http://www.ebookmall.com/ebook/163908-ebook.htm. My website: www.geocities.com/bdcaterino

http://bdcaterino.proboards36.com/index.cgi To visit my message boards.

He hopes the death threats will stop. It is only words he uses. Laugh and lighten up will ya?

Email: bobdcaterino56@aol.com

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