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Mar. 10, 2005 Drama has always been pro-wrestling’s life- support; however, while the WWE’s writing staff is on crack, because of the constant “F-up’s” that the WWE is enduring. Randy Orton to face the Undertaker? The writers brought “Overrated Orton” into another “Rock” and the fans embraced it at first, but then Randy was labeled as “flavor of the month.” The sad thing is, I don’t doubt that Randy Orton is a bad wrestler as far as performing in the ring; however, when it comes to speaking on the microphone or going over with the fans, Randy Orton literally “sucks.” The John Cena character is, in my opinion, is one of the worst gimmicks ever, all because the writers had this bright idea that since Eminem was “booming” the WWE had this “brilliant” idea of having a white rapper. What I find intriguing about professional wrestling is that the “drama” that needs to be addressed, in my opinion, always happens backstage. While true fans realize the “drama” between Matt Hardy, Lita, and a certain RAW superstar in a “love triangle.” Lita and Matt Hardy have been dating for a long time, which was no surprise to the fans, but one thing that shocked the fans, including myself, because I like Matt Hardy and Lita. Lita and a certain RAW superstar–rumors have claimed Edge, but nothing is confirmed– apparently had an affair with each other, thus adultery has taken place between this certain RAW superstar and Lita. While Matt Hardy is on the injury list, Hardy was rumored to be on RAW; however, the “head- office” of the WWE told Hardy to stay away from the arena. Confused? Lita was at the arena that night in a surprise visit. Can you see Vince’s gears turning in his head? If Vince decides to use this RAW superstar and Hardy in a feud, it would be good business, it may not and is not good taste, but it is still good business. The writers in the WWE should actually prove their intelligence and have the name Evolution and rename it to Devolution. This is actually a joke. One dramatic moment in pro-wrestling is the battle between Raven and Joey Styles. The battle consists of a former ECW episode where Raven “crucified” a wrestler by the name of the Sandman. The crucifixion “offended” everyone at the ECW Arena that Raven came back and politely apologized to the crowd. According to Raven, the apology was ludicrous, and that despite he said the words “I’m sorry,” he didn’t mean them. Former ECW commentator, Joey Styles, called blasphemy against Raven and said that “Raven’s action with the crucifixion is as bad as Vince’s idea of a group named ‘the Un- American’s’ saying that the president couldn’t protect his own people.” I remember that show, and it was aired directly AFTER September 11, 2001. The drama continues outside the “squared-circle” with Christy Hemme. Christy Hemme is not a wrestler, she’s “eye-candy” and just like the typical “eye-candy” Christy Hemme is an idiot. I was listening to a popular radio show and the host of the show had Ms. Hemme go one on one with an 11-year-old kid ina quiz show. The questions regarding this quiz were fairly simple. Who is the secretary of state? What two men were against Bush/Cheney? Who is the secretary of defense? Who is Vince McMahon? The 11 year old knew every question except who is Vince McMahon. Ms. Hemme, Ms. Playboy, didn’t know any questions except who is Vince McMahon. Speaking of Christy Hemme and stupidity. She’s facing Trish Stratus for the women’s world title. I already know who won. The answer is Christy. How do I know? Playboy said so on the cover, even Trish acknowledged it, which I thought was funny because it was either a typo or another WWE “F-Up.” I think it’s funny, where did the ‘F’ go in the WWE/F? It went to the writer’s department, because they keep “F’ing up.” Batista, stop with the thumbs down. It was cool at first, now it sucks. I predict Hogan will wrestle at WM, because he’s “all American.” Hassan needs an opponent, and who better to wrestle him, since Hogan is going to be at WM anyway, than Hulk Hogan? ------------ About the author Eric Schomburg: Useless-Knowledge Columnist of the year 2004. An Apocalyptic Dream is now out for purchase. Check out both books at http://www.geocities.com/schomburg2002. Email: schomburg2002@yahoo.com Tell a friend about this site! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
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