My Wishes For My Memorial Services

Articles

My Wishes For My Memorial Services

By Kaycee Nilson
July 29, 2005

I know this is a gory column and not something that everyone thinks of. But I have made my plans for what I wish to happen when the fateful day happens of my departure from this earthly plane. I made these plans when I was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer that I am now in remission from.

Any internal organs that can be transplanted to save someone else’s life, please donate them, save that other life for there are millions on waiting lists to get a new organ. The rest of my empty shell is to be transported to the University of Tennessee to the “Body Farm.” By studying the decay of my body, maybe a cold case file can be solved and the grief of another family can end with the justice of putting a criminal behind bars. I may have not accomplished much in life, but in death, I may be more than I was in life.

For my Memorial Service, I want it held in a banquet hall with Sangrias and wines and fruit and cheese trays served. I would love to have all my favorite pictures in collages around the room with my favorite flowers in silk, bluebonnets, cream and pink roses and woodland violets. Anyone that wants to stand up and publicly share a happy memory that they have of me in their life, I want them to be able to. Start a list one week before. If there are people that want to share a memory but are unable to attend, let them write a letter or send a tape recording. I don’t care how long the Memorial takes, just so long as everyone that wishes to say something is given their turn no matter how short or how long their memory is or if hey have more than one memory to share.

Plus I want the entire thing to be underscored with my favorite songs. Believe me, I have a play list that will last for hours. Now, I can’t order anyone NOT to cry, but for those that do, just remember, I had a good life and I got more than I deserved at times. Like a man that loved me for who I am and he didn’t change me (except for trying to make me quit smoking) and three beautiful children that I love dearly and are so precious because I was told at 16 I would never be able to have children no matter what.

But this is my final wish rather than to have some stuffy funeral service were only a clergy person gets to speak and no one else does. I want everyone that loved me to gather together and remember with each other their memories of me. A Healing Circle, if you will. I want people to gather together to tell each other how I touched their lives. I want them to be able to share the good times with each other.

But at least I know now that my immortality lies in the hearts and memories of those that know me and love me. Those that are proud to call me their friend. Those that call me their family even though we are not blood relations. Those that have touched my life as well.

I have written out words to be placed on a scroll to be handed out to all that attend the service. Just some final and personal words from me. I am not writing now what is going to be on that scroll for it is personal to those people that attend my memorial.

I just want a Memorial Service that reflects me and what I want instead of my family guessing at what I want. So by writing it down and placing it in the fire safe, I have taken that part and helped them to know what my wishes are for when my expiration date is at hand.

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About the author: Kaycee Nilson has completed her first novel, "Night Falls on Chicago." The first two chapters can be viewed at http://www.KayceeNilson.com.

Besides writing columns for Useless-Knowledge, Kaycee is currently working on two more novels, "From the Mind of a Vampire", and "I'll Love You Til You Die."

If you have enjoyed what you read, or would like to leave Kaycee a message, please visit her message board at http://www.KayceeNilson.com/Board

Email: Kaycee@kayceenilson.com

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