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July 27, 2005 I read Amanda Baker's article, "Child Support: Theft Or Not" with interest, being that I have been on both sides of the equation. With that in mind, I offer this take on the issue of child support in California. I am a single father raising two kids--a thirteen-year old son and an eleven-year old daughter. I share custody of my seven-year old with his mother. I have had custody of the two oldest since they turned six months old. Their mother is not a crackhead, nor she is so mentally unbalanced where it can be perceived by a layman. In her words she simply "Does not feel like being a mother." Perhaps she should have considered that thirteen years ago before she disrobed for me. From April 1991 to June 1996 I took care of my four oldest children while their mother and her boyfriend moved to Massachusetts, then Kansas. The mother was a crackhead as was the boyfriend. At the time I took custody of the kids they ranged in age from 9 to 15. Despite the fact that county officials knew of her drug use, they let the children remain in her home. Finally the children grew tired of suffering and just left. They came to my house and a few days later their mother dropped off their clotehs. Four days later she left without so much as a good-bye. She, her boyfriend and their three kids just packed up and left. I worked at a steel mill at the time, so I was more than capable of supporting and caring for my kids. I have a younger seven-year old. During the past two years, I have had him 2/3 of the time. His mother has sickle cell anemia and occasionally has a crisis that hospitalizes her 3-4 days at a time. But this woman also has a boyfriend who is a trucker, so she spends anywhere from 18 to 30 days at a time on the road with him, while I attend to my son. But she and I have agreed that since we share custody, the issue of child support is irrelevant. In the case of the first woman, she pays me sixty dollars a month in child support. She claims to work part-time but I know differently. So does the county, but they can't change the support order for three years. Second, she lives with her mother in a house that is already paid for, so her expenses are minimal. Worse, during the time that I’ve had the children, she has kept them a grand total of forty days—despite the fact that we live but four miles apart. In the case of the second woman, I received nothing. As I mentioned, I was a steelworke. However, this woman had TWO jobs and by her own admission spent the majority of her money on rent, crack and alcohol. During her five- year absence, she telephoned our children a grand total of three times. Now let’s look at what happened when they were the custodial parents. During a seven-year stretch I paid 58,800 dollars in child support. I didn’t mind because it was my duty to care for them. Even though I spent time with them, I was paying what I thought was an exorbitant amount of support. Mu mistake was being young, dumb and fathering children with women who believed that work is for suckers. I paid on average 700 dollars a month, while the grant these ladies received averaged $584 per month. Not only that, but I surrendered an additional $5,500 in income tax returns. I don't consider these women thieves. Lazy and ignorant, yes. However, I consider what the District Attorney did to be nothing short of forcing me tio pay ransom. They got court orders that forced me to pay money for children I shared custody of. Never once did they call me in and ask if I could pay; they just simply broadsided me with a wage garnishment ($1104 per month) until I came to court and provided the necessary proof that I should be paying 47% less. When I took custody of the kids the representative from the District Attorney’s office informed me, "Though it’s the tenth of the month and we’re aware you assumed physical custody of your children, Ms. ---- is entitled to one more support check." Huh? In short, I was also supporting her kids that she had by another man, who was unemployed. In California, if you assume care of children that aren’t yours and later you and that woman split up, you can still be held responsible for the support of those children. In short, the county is going to get money from somebody—and they don’t care if they screw that person in the process. Even worse, the county pockets part of the support payment. While most parents who receive child support are impoverished single women, some of them are flat-out lazy and vengeful. Some have income they don’t report. Meanwhile, hard working parents must fight through waves of red tape to receive any kind of justice. Is child support robbery? In most cases, no. But in a few cases it’s not only robbe4r, but pimping of the tallest order. ------------ About the author: Timothy Stelly is the 46-year old author of "Tempest In The Stone" and the soon to be released, "The Malice of Cain". His third novel, "Darker Than Blue" is under consideration for publication. Mr. Stelly currently resides in Pittsburg, California with his three youngest children Dante, Kimberly and Lawrence. Excerpts from The first two books and the first two chapters of his anthology, "Frankenigga--And Other Urban Tales" can be viewed at: stellbread0.tripod.com Email: stellbread@sbcglobal.com Tell a friend about this site! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
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