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Feb. 8, 2005 A year after Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction was interpreted as a sign of the end times, the NFL, pressured by rabid fundamentalists, decided to go as family friendly as possible in this year's halftime show, in a bid to forestall the arrival of Armageddon. Unfortunately, the safe and staid halftime program was family friendly -- only to a family of octogenarians in a nursing home. Sir Paul McCartney's play list consisted of songs that he made popular decades ago. We've all heard these chestnuts hundreds of times -- usually when riding in an elevator. There was no chance of McCartney suffering a wardrobe malfunction; I just thank God he didn't suffer an adult diapers malfunction. There was no danger of a lip-synch controversy either, you could tell it was the denture wearing voice of on old fogy singing. Halftime is a chance for gridiron fans to raid the fridge or go to the john, but this year's halftime "entertainment" induced me to sleep. It's usually the game that lulls me to nod off. Last year's halftime extravaganza was produced by MTV, who was this year's travesty produced by, The Senior Citizens Network? The NFL should not be held responsible for this boring entertainment; the few religious nuts who waxed apoplectic by the exposure of a nipple should shoulder the blame. I'm not advocating a halftime performance that features Janet Jackson exposing her breast or Lil' Kim flashing her nether regions, but can we please have an entertainer who doesn't look like Madonna's great-grandfather? ------------ About the author: Robert Paul Reyes is a columnist for the Lynchburg Ledger. Email: rreyes4966@aol.com Tell a friend about this site! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
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