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Aug. 20, 2005 So I sit here finding myself thinking about all that I hate. We do not hate others for who they are but there actions. I like everything except stupidity. Just do me a favor, if you are sensitive then read something else. If you are, or do stupid things then read away, this will go over your head anyway. You know what burns me up? A candle about yo high. You know how to keep a stupid person in suspense? Get one thing straight here and now, the world is not ending, the devil isn't going to get you through the television, and Sylvester Stallone is not going to make another Rocky movie, so cool your jets. Some of you panic at the drop of a dime and as for the rest of you, thanks for being normal. Folks it is called winter, spring, summer and fall. These are our seasons changing and they have been for a trillion years now. No, the world is not ending; fall is just around the corner so why don't you follow suit. Go around the corner and fall. This makes me mad. We get some rain or a heat wave then we are doomed. I am tired of the freaking Chicken Little attitudes the doom seekers have so do me one favor, please. Do not under any circumstances read about the giant mammoth animals running amuck in our fair cities. They were mutated by our scientists by crossing an elephant and a rhinoceros. What are these monster mammoths called you ask? (Eleph-ino) "Hell if I know." So stay indoors people please before you get a tusk up the wazoo. Now I can understand at times, if it gets icy out or snowy, that the traffic slows down. But when it rains there should be no reason to slow it down to a snails pace and still have accidents all over the roadways. I think they are handing out licenses out via the quota system. If you can't see over the steering wheel then you have no business driving. If you do not have tome to apply makeup in the privacy of your own home then do not do it while driving. If you want to do the nasty then get a room, don't do it driving, one stick shift per car people. This also goes for reading and blind people. If you can't read the street signs or are over a hundred years old then get off the roads, please, children are not speed bumps, well most children. To whom it may concern. At the top of my list has got to be the promotions experts. Yeah I will admit that a man that has a snow ball head will definitely make me run out and buy the product. Or a perverted King that wakes up in some guys bed he doesn't know and the same said King peeping in a house unexpectedly. This brings a new meaning to "Have it your way" now doesn't it. The newest annoyance is the "Ranch Tooth" thing. I guess they think the more irritating they are the more hungry we will be. Now that old man dancing around on that commercial is cool. I enjoy watching a twenty year old dressed up as a ninety year old dancing around inviting you to go on rides. This isn't demeaning to the elderly now is it? Oh I forgot. These commercials are geared for the naive and stupid people. Good for them. I am also guilty of stupidity. I have a stupid family that thinks by spending all of my elderly parents money before they are dead is a great way to force them to live with them and keep them in check. I am the black sheep I must say. The rest of my family is very attached to one another, at the wrist and ankles. Oh yeah they will argue that I am wrong. As my sister visits the coast of Italy my mom sits in her one room watching a coaster mold up. My brother will keep begging for my mother's house, empty house until he gets it but trust me he will never get it. The D in my name stands for dysfunctional but we didn't put that there we put the F and the U. Last but least, I want to congratulate my sister and brother in law for sending there son, my nephew to the Marines right out of high school. In these times it is the smartest move they had ever done. I have a better idea. Why not skip the Marines all together and just send him to Iraq for a vacation just to see if he will like it there. Well this coming from people that told me that when you blow up a picture to a larger size more items will show in that same picture. This is coming from a man that drove drunk and hit the same car on the highway seven times, then called the police and blamed the other driver. This is coming from a man that was so waited he peed on the living room couch because he thought it was the urinals at the bar. Sending your child off to war is the smartest thing you ever done by far. Rent the movie "Hair" better yet don't, you won't get it anyway. Stupid people make me sick. Maybe it's me, nope its you. ------------ About the author: Bob D Caterino is a writer that we all either hate or love. His work can be found at http://www.ebookmall.com/ebook/163906-ebook.htm. My website: www.geocities.com/bdcaterino He hopes the death threats will stop. Its only words he uses. Laugh and lighten up will ya? Email: VitoGoomba@aol.com Tell a friend about this site! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
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