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Aug. 18, 2005 I am a father. I have a daughter who will turn 21 years old next month. She is my only child. When I got divorced in 1995, I stayed close by her side. I knew she needed both of her parents through the difficult time we were all going through. In fact, I broke up with the next several women I dated because they asked me to choose between my daughter and them. A cynic would say I did not love these women enough to be my future wife. That may have been true, but in my heart, my daughter was #1 with me. I should never have dated in the first place. My heart was already taken. My daughter was born on September 19, 1984. She almost didn't make it. My wife went into premature labor earlier that summer and the doctor told us to rush to the hospital's critical care unit. I can remember running to the garage that night with tears in my eyes praying to God, "If you are going to take anyone, please take me...don't take my daughter. Give her the chance of life." He spared both of us, even though my prayer was illogical. (God doesn't cut "deals.") But, I was so scared at the moment, I wasn't sure how to pray coherently. I just poured out my heart to Him. I loved my little girl even before she was born. I couldn't wait to meet her... That moment came soon after 7:03 p.m. on that September night. After they laid her down on my wife's chest for some mother-daughter bonding, I finally got to hold my baby in the elevator on the way up to the room. It was magical. I just kept smiling and crying and thinking, "I never want to let you go! I love you so much. You are my little girl forever!" I meant it then, I mean it now. She is in her sophomore year of college and lives with me. It is a pleasure to put her through school. She will always remain the largest part of my heart... Dave Holloway has a daughter, too. Her name is Natalee Holloway. Since May 30, this father has lived the worst nightmare that can befall a dad. His heart was jolted beyond recognition upon first hearing the horrific news that his little girl, on the verge of womanhood, had mysteriously vanished in a faraway land. From his safe haven in Jackson, Mississippi, he staggered out of bed and sat there frozen in his emotions, numb to the pain that seared his heart and reeling from the emotional reality that was soon ripping into his soul. His Natalee, the girl he helped bring into this world on October 21, 1986, was gone. Was this a temporary disappearance or....? As a father, I could not even imagine what Dave Holloway was thinking and feeling in those early hours. We have not seen or heard much from Natalee's father. We see Beth and Jug on television almost nightly and we admire them for their tenacity and the relentless search for the truth about what happened the night she disappeared. We only see Dave in brief snatches of news clips. He is a quiet man. A reserved soul. But, I can assure you from the depth of my own experience, he is hurting inside beyond belief. His pain may even be greater than Beth's because she is able to verbalize and express her anger and emotions continually. This is a father who silently suffers. For the past two weeks, he has quietly gotten up and headed for the landfill at 7:30 a.m.and stayed there until 5:30 p.m. No parent should have to watch a large scoop churn out pieces of garbage and hope against hope that your daughter's body parts do not fall out of that rotten mess. With each vertical dig into the landfill, his heart has to die a little more. What must go through his mind as he sits there crying inside? Does he see images of little Natalee as he remembers pushing her on the swings and giving her horsey back rides? Does he imagine all the times he took her for ice cream? Does he relive in his mind, the innumerable times he tucked her into bed night after night as he kissed her on the forehead and assured her upon leaving the room, "It's okay, sweet girl; no one will hurt you! You're safe. Daddy will protect you." That is what I did. That is what I would remember. If you have a child, you know exactly what I am saying here. A daughter is your little girl. Always. This is an ageless phenomenon. One completely understood as a parent and just as completely misunderstood by the child as she grows older... Even though my daughter is an adult, I make her call me at midnight just to check in to let me know she is okay. She doesn't have a curfew, but since she lives with me, she does it out of respect. I tell her I love her every day in the event of the unexpected. I want her to know that if something ever happens to me she will ALWAYS know that. I know that Dave Holloway was with his daughter right before she left for Aruba at her graduation from high school. There is a picture of them together. It is amazing how much they look alike. I know he will never forget that night as long as he lives. I know he told her that night that he loved her. It is his only way of coping now...knowing that the last time he saw his Natalee she KNEW how much he loved her. There is a trust fund for Dave Holloway. I heard he is financially hurting right now because he is not able to work. I am sending him a check. I know the Twittys have plenty of donations, so I am going to help him out. So many people's lives changed after May 30, including a father who does not say a whole lot but speaks with his heart and his actions. Natalee was lucky to have a father like him. I hope she knows, wherever she is, that his devotion to her has never wavered. She was daddy's girl. She will always be daddy's girl. Even though it is very probable this daddy will never be able to see his girl again. But, he will always know that the love he has for her will never change. Ever. He will always be Natalee's daddy. And, she will always be his girl. My daughter just got back from getting something to eat. It is 9:04 p.m. here. Time for me to go tell her I love her and that she is safe because her daddy is here.... ------------ About the author: Pat Hurley has won three Emmy awards for writing, hosting and producing television shows. He resides in Southern California. Email: coolhumor@sbcglobal.net Tell a friend about this site! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com. Please link to this article rather than copying and pasting it onto your site (which would be unauthorized and illegal). |
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