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Apr. 23, 2005 Welcome to another riveting episode of Sam’s whinge. My whinge today is about shopping centre car parks. Why is it that when we enter a shopping centre we loose all functioning brain activity? People, who would be considered excellent drivers on the road, suddenly forget which lane they are supposed to drive in, what their indicator is for and that when they see a car coming that they are meant to give way to, they forget which pedal is the brake. Why? Oh why must we go through this? I’ll admit I get so much shopping centre rage. Pedestrians that feel the need to walk out in front of the car, when they have stopped and looked to see it coming. Or worse the indecisive crosser, they are the ones who think about going so you stop the car and then get irritated with you and wave you on frantically, but when you are about to drive past them decide it is a good time to walk out in front of the car, causing the driver to slam the brakes on smashing their eggs to the floor of the car. But it seems that this irritating behaviour is not just contained to the car park, but it happens in the supermarket also. I really believe that shoppers need to sit a trolley licence before operating them. Also I think we need fully comprehensive insurance that covers, damage to ankles, theft from trolley when trying to decide what spaghetti sauce to buy, and damage to shirts by children sucking on sticky lollies and wiping their grubby hands down you as they go past. So many times have I had my Achilles tendon almost shredded by maniac trolley boys, or people that are so busy admiring all the pretty colours of hair dye they forget to stop. So many times have I come away from the supermarket swearing to never do my shopping on pension day ever again. So many times have I vowed to shop at two in the morning when no one is about. Now speaking of shopping centres on pension day, I live in a town of only eighty five thousand people but every second Thursday I am sure they come from Melbourne just to shop at the local supermarket. Also being a tourist town it gets worse school holidays, oh how I hate school holidays. Kids every where, the stupid Thomas the tank engine train tootling its way around, parents screaming at children to hold on to the trolley or they will get such a beating, people standing gossiping like they hadn’t seen each other for years yet only live next door and blue haired old ladies aiming up my ankles with their wheelie baskets and walking frames. It is a conspiracy I tell you, a conspiracy. The shopping centre is a perfectly normal and sane place until I enter the car park and then they all come out to get me I’m sure of it. Well that has been Sam’s whinge stay tuned next time when Sam attacks drivers in the fast lane, driving slowly. ------------ Email Samantha King: kingy351@bigpond.net.au Tell a friend about this site! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com. Please link to this article rather than copying and pasting it onto your site (which would be unauthorized and illegal). |
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