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May 19, 2010 Growing up Catholic in a small closely knit Catholic community in the 1940s has been rewarding and comforting. The Catholic faith is a beautiful faith and provided a stimulating environment during my growing up period. But the church I knew during that time is not the church of today. So it is not surprising that I am not the devout Catholic that I once was. I remain grateful, however, for the life that I was dealt. Living across the street from the Catholic Church and getting ten years of Catholic education taught by dedicated Franciscan nuns could not help but leave an indelible mark on one’s psyche. What were important issues to me then based on what was important to the nuns apparently are no longer important issues for the Catholic Church. I don’t feel that I left the church. The church left me. I served as an altar boy from the fourth grade and would have completed my service through the tenth if it hadn’t been for Sister Mary Clarence. I continued to serve Mass during my Air Force years. On the Air Force bases the chaplain would frequently offer Mass without an alter boy. I always stepped forward. In Gila Bend, Arizona where I was stationed for 18 months, I attended church in the Spanish section of the town. The priest came from another town and had no assigned alter boy. I often filled in. I can still recite most of the Mass prayers, in Latin of course. I miss the Latin Mass although I fully appreciate the rationale for offering it in the vernacular. Still being somewhat of a Latin scholar and owning a Latin missal to follow the Mass provided a sense of tranquility. I attended Mass daily if I could, especially in college. I remember one Christmas I attended all three Masses – midnight, 8 am, and 10 am. The Gesu church on campus is a magnificent structure and has six side altars. At times there would be that many Masses in progress. With a large Jesuit teaching staff and the requirement for each member to say mass daily, a multiple Mass schedule was necessary. There were usually enough students in attendance who were willing to serve Mass. Going to Confession I don’t miss going to confession I question the wisdom of preparing young souls for that sacrament so they will be ready for their first Communion. Those of us who were sinless (or thought we were) had to come up with something before entering that dark box called a confessional. And if we couldn’t think of anything between confessions, Sister said we could still obtain grace by confessing what we confessed in previous confessions. The emphasis seemed to be on obtaining points in heaven rather than absolution. It is my observation that the church of today deemphasizes confession. The number of Catholics going to confession on a regular basis is a far cry from what it used to be. On a Saturday night in Kellnersville, a priest was always available at a scheduled time, usually7 to 9 pm. Sometimes people would have to wait in line. Confessions were almost always necessary if one is to be in the “state of grace” to receive Communion on Sunday. I usually went to confession every Saturday night. Painful as it was to prepare and go to confession, the after glow one receives after cleansing one’s soul is hard to describe. It’s a feeling of holiness combined with joy and peace. So I receive communion on Sunday and start sinning all over again on Monday. Communion Receiving communion for the first time is a milestone in the life of every Catholic child. But the reverence afforded the Eucharist seems to have dwindled since my Catholic school days. Lay people didn’t give communion then much less take the host to someone’s home. This is a far cry from when it was necessary to use a patent under one’s chin to catch any particles. I seemed to have missed something along the way. I remember long hours spent in “adoration of the Blessed Sacrament.” Is that done anymore? My biggest concern, however, is how freely communion is given to anyone who approaches the communion rail. What happened to the requirement to be in the state of grace? I was somewhat taken back at my mother’s funeral when almost the entire congregation stepped forward to receive communion. Based on what I was taught by the nuns at St Joe’s, I remained in my pew. I understand that the church no longer portrays Hell as a place of fire and brimstone. I’ll keep searching the web to get some answers here. Someone needs to get the word to Sister Rosina if she is still around. While making a presentation in front of my eight grade class, I bumped into an extremely hot radiator. In response to my cry of pain, Sister merely commented, “Donald, hell will be even hotter.” I’m sure I missed something along the way. So I keep searching for answers only to discover that every question doesn’t have an answer. Not knowing where to turn for answers, I turned to the Internet. After all, we are living in the Information Age. One Catholic web site provided some answers and I plan to use that to continue my Catholic education. Sorry Sister Mary Clarence, but I need more answers than you were able to give. See Appendix 10-1 for a picture of the home page of the web site. Our parents were practicing Catholics and felt no need to discuss or question the authority of the church. They set good examples instead. I remember, on many occasions, walking by my parents’ bedroom seeing my father kneeling by the bed or cedar chest saying his morning or evening prayers. He always tipped his hat (and he usually always wore one) whenever we passed a Catholic church. He had an aunt who was a nun. When we visited Sister Beatrix in the convent we would be sure to take along a bottle of beer. Being a Catholic nun didn’t mean (even then) that you had to be a prude Our daughters didn’t have the “benefit” of a Catholic education. They went to CCD classes instead, and we went to church every Sunday, Millie never became a convert but it’s not because she didn’t try. She did her best to see that we followed the rules of the church. Considering that she grew up in the Bible belt where people considered Catholicism a sect, she did quite well in the roll of Catholic wife and mother.
The church has come a long way in recognizing and respecting other religions. In my youth it was considered a sin to attend services of another denomination. Catholic doctrine still teaches that the Catholic Church is the one true church. But we all need to seek spiritual guidance from God, Allah, or Jehovah (different names for the same Supreme Being) in our own individual way. In spite of what we were taught by the nuns, I can now feel comfortable in any church regardless of the denomination, But in spite of everything that has been written here and because of my past experiences, I will probably turn to the Catholic Church for future spiritual needs.
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