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Oct. 15, 2009 A conversation I heard the other day: "Did you hear that Barack Obama has been crowned Miss America?" "Barack Obama? Who the heck is she?" "She? She? That's the president, Bozo." "Oh yeah. Yes, yes, of course. But hearing his name in that context threw me for a minute.* "Context? What do you mean, context?" "Well, hearing about him as a beauty queen was a new one on me." "Why, what's the problem?" "No problem, really. But he's not all that beautiful." "Sure he is. You're just a racist." "Not really. I would have said the same thing if John McCain had been named Miss America." "So, what's your problem?" "Well, he's not female." "How do you know? Have you ever seen him naked? And why would he have to be female anyway? Are you some kind of sexist dinosaur? What you're talking is sexual discrimination." "Well, some things do seem to require being able to distinguish males from females." "See what I mean? You're a male chauvinist pig." "But Obama has done absolutely nothing to deserve the prize. Not only is he the goofiest looking broad I have ever seen, he's not even from the United States. If they name him anything, they should name him Miss Kenya." "He has does more this year to advance the rights of women than any other person on the planet. He has also been an indefatigable champion of gay marriage. So it's entirely appropriate that he has been chosen Miss America." "But he's married. How can he be Miss Anything?" Shouldn't he be Ms. America or Mrs. America?" "This is a pledge for the future. This is a vision of a wonderful day when anyone may be chosen as Miss America, without regard to race, religion, sex, sexual orientation, national origin, political views, physical appearance or criminal antecedents," "Well what about Osama bin Laden as Miss Saudi Arabia?" "Now you're being silly." ------------ About the author Thomas Keyes: I have written two books: A SOJOURN IN ASIA (non-fiction) and A TALE OF UNG (fiction), neither published so far. I have studied languages for years and traveled extensively on five continents. Visit my website here. Email: udikeyes@yahoo.com Comment on this article here! 
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