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Oct. 2, 2009 What do the placid waters of the lower Potomac and the Reflecting Pool at the National Mall have in common? Both of them reflect Washington scenery. If you look closely, you notice that each day there is something new to reflect. Today these two waters reflect Afghanistan. Yup, you have read correctly. Washington is in a Kabulian mess. To analyze the cause of this mess we must first dig deep. Once a year, we see a rather strange spectacle. It’s called The Army Navy game. So far, so good. However, the sport practiced is a misnomer. Participants, organizers and the American public call if football. The keen observer will notice that the participants dispute the possession of an oblong object and hardly ever use their feet. Now, real football is a game with a ball. A football is a spherical object that not only looks like a ball, but is really a ball that gets kicked with the foot every few seconds. In the Army Navy game, we have cadets who will eventually assume critical leadership positions. Playing games under wrong assumptions is bad training. This training will mark them for life and prevent them from winning wars. If you spend your career playing oblong thinking you are playing football, you will never achieve your goal. In football, one team tries to have control of the ball, penetrate the other team’s defenses and score a goal. In oblong someone tosses the oblong to another player, in a few seconds the action stops as must players end up in a messy Kabulian pile. Now that we understand oblong, we may proceed. Early this year in true oblongian fashion, President Obama and his military advisors devised a new strategy for Afghanistan. General McChrystal was named team captain and troops were added. Only a few weeks after the much ballyhooed landing of a Marine expeditionary force in Helmand Province, McChrystal announced we are loosing the war. Right now, in true oblongian fashion, we have Obama, Biden, Clinton, McCrystal, Gates, Petreus splattered on the ground arguing, more troops, less troops, what to do with the new strategy.
Do I need to repeat the word oblong?
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