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June 24, 2009 It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune is not, apparently, looking for my daughter. I am the mother of a beautiful (even said by others to be stunning), intelligent, kind and loving daughter with a University education and a great job but who is approaching the big three zero and who has not, as yet, met her Mr Right. She has met Mr Drone On Till I Fall Asleep, Mr World's Greatest Gift and even Mr Thought I Loved You (painful). But not Mr Right. I watch with ever increasing sadness as she struggles manfully on while friends slowly fall away with their Mr Right and become fully paid up members of the Smug Married club. A club she would dearly love to be a member of. Her circle of friends are now, in the main, occupied with either engagement plans, wedding plans or plans for the nursery. Darling daughter is now in the Bridget Jones situation – arriving for dinner at a friends, she finds she's the only single one there. Girls night out has now been replaced by girl night in with a dvd. It seems as if, by the age of thirty, just about all the decent men are taken. Surely this can't be?! She has tried the online dating sites – the most well known ones and the slightly more obscure and yes, I have to agree with her, there are a lot of wierdos out there! Is a tall (she's 5'10 in heels), well educated professional man who still has at least some hair and all his own teeth not to be found anywhere? Apparently binge drinking plays a large part in socialising these days and while she likes a glass of wine or a couple of drinks she is not into vomiting in the street – did that and got the T-shirt when she was seventeen. Nor is she into jumping into bed with someone who's second question after 'what's your name' is 'are you up for it?'. Mmm, charming. You'll be thinking she's some sort of prude. Not at all. She's just not a slag but in today's society that seems to be a handicap. Other efforts to meet a nice guy have included joining various clubs including the local gym but while she's met many interesting people, she hasn't met Mr Right. The annual summer holiday has now become the latest problem to be solved. Too old to go on the 'under thirty' holidays and not one to let a little detail like being single stop her - she has struck out on her own and gone off to the States for a couple of weeks. A seasoned traveller, she just adores New York. Luckily, I am not alone in my plight. I have a good friend who has a daughter of similar age who is in the same position. We meet regularly to commiserate and save each other's sanity. We give each other hope and rally somewhat with the thought that thirty isn't really that old..........there's time yet............even though we know the biological clock is ticking. There is an overwhelming feeling on the part of Darling Daughter, that she is simply being 'left behind'. That life wasn't supposed to have turned out like this. That she always imagined herself married with a couple of children by now and before anyone replies saying there's nothing wrong with the modern woman being unmarried or why conform to an old fashioned ideal etc – it's what she wants. There is no pressure on her from any quarter to fill the roll of wife and mother. It's just something she has always envisaged for herself and it makes me so sad that it hasn't happened.
She has been the bridesmaid, but never the bride and doesn't relish the thought of being the elderly spinster aunt of neices and nephews. Others laughingly say 'you'll meet him when you least expect it!' She's been not expecting it for some time now. Still, I'm a great believer in miracles and you never know................ maybe Mr D'Arcy will be on the plane to New York................
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