HOME | FUNNY ARTICLES | TOP NEWS REPORTS | SUBMIT
|
Dec. 28, 2009 I don’t have a top ten list of the major news events of the past decade, however a handful of events did draw my interest. Some are calling it a decade of introspection, which I think is a crock. For starters, if we looked inside ourselves collectively. We wouldn’t like what we see—and there are enough hate groups, PACs and biased media outlets to prove it. Like Standard Oil before it became Exxon , America is “Still the same old gas.” There are a few news stories however, that I think merit a brief mention. Knowing today’s video-addicted-AD/HDD (Addled, Distracted, Haedheaded, Dumbed-Down) generation , this will all be forgotten by 2011. The Attacks of 9/11: America learned it was vulnerable to a mad man with a grudge and a plan. We also learned that despite our military might, there were some gaping holes in our homeland security. The FBI and CIA blew the last-second lay-up on this one, causing mass panic and a flag-waving moment unrivaled since Pearl Harbor . The end result was the creation of the Department of Homeland Security, more coordination between the FBI and CIA and a threat level system that only instilled more panic. Subsequently—President George W. Bush, Attorney General John Ashcroft, Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld attempted to dupe Americans into believing we could be safer if we sacrificed a few of our freedoms. 8 years later, Americans seem to have settled back into their usual complacency. The Death of Newspapers: : How can we be one of the most literate countries on earth and produce some of the dumbest bastards ever? (See BUSH, GEORGE W.; QUAYLE, DANFOIRTH). In a society where we encourage children to misspell words intentionally and where some zealots have launched a movement to teach phonetic spelling rather than traditional English, I can see why books and newspapers are disappearing. What the hell is going on here? Are we so hung up on soundbites that we can’t take time out to read an in-depth report on what’s going on around us? The dinner table discussion is a thing of the past, and X-box, i-pod, computers, etc. have further shaved down family time. Okay, I wandered off course a bit. Most major newspapers are struggling to stay afloat, and the lists of those teetering on bankruptcy include: The Houston Chronicle, Chicago Sun-Times, San Diego Union-Tribune, San Francisco Chronicle, The New York Daily News, Boston Globe, Minneapolis Star-Tribune, Miami Herald, Detroit News, Cleveland Plain Dealer, Philadelphia Inquirer, et al. More telling are the papers that have already failed—The Seattle Post-Intelligencer, The Rocky Mountain News. Some of these papers will go online, which is probably the future of such publishing. Say goodbye to journalism as we know, and hello to op-ed. We are a nation that is being dumbed down. The Election of Barack Obama: Definitely a grand achievement in black history, and an important step internationally, as Barack Obama became the first black lead to lead a country with a predominantly European population. Obama is catching hell from the far right, which was to be expected. When you are the first black anything—whether it’s in Major League Baseball, on the steps of Central High School in Little Rock Arkansas, in Congress (Hiram Revels), or Charlie Sifford trying to make his mark in the Professional Golf Association—you can expect to be ridiculed because of your race and perceived as inferior in some capacity. Obama is no exception, nor is his wife, Michelle. After eleven months in office—about a quarter of the way through his first term—America is showing a high degree of impatience and intolerance as the Obama administration undergoes intense scrutiny and disrespect. Right-wing flamethrowers like Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, Glenn Beck, Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity, deride the President for everything from his inability to repair The House (of cards) That George Built, to his N.Y. City date with his wife. Obama has been called a liar (during a Congressional address, no less), dubbed a socialist, racist, Muslim sympathizer and an illegal alien. He has also been compared to Adolf Hitler. The only credit the right gives him is for shattering the myth of Hillary Clinton’s invincibility. (Don’t think she’s forgotten it.) Hurricane Katrina: Once again, everyday Americans showed how big their hearts are, when major portions of the Gulf States flooded, including the city of New Orleans. The flood resulted in a mass exodus of a predominantly African-American population. It was a bad time for our government to show its apathy and ineptitude. Of course, when it became a political liability for the President and the shoe-shopping Condoleezza Rice, The effects of that deluge are still being felt today. That North Korean Knucklehead: : America has found its new villain, Kim Jong Il, who follows in the footsteps of other notable targets of American anger: Adolf Hitler, Emperor Hirohito, Nikita Kruschev, Ayatollah Khomeini, Slobodan Milosevic and Saddam Hussein. Kim has long been little more than a pus-filled pimple on America ’s backside. However, with the Soviet Union looking more and more like a weak sister every day, Kim might pose the biggest threat to the safety of Americans. Reports are that he has a functioning nuclear arsenal that he is working to improve, at the expense of a starving population. Second, he has the largest army in the world—more than a million soldiers. With America ’s military resources already spread thin, any attack on America would have to be settled quickly. This might entail the U.S. to use tactical nukes. He has threatened to attack the U.S. and these are threats that the Obama Administration is taking seriously. It’s not like we couldn’t wipe Kim’s boys out in a few weeks, but the damage he could inflict in South Korea and Japan could make any such conflict a lose-lose proposition. The Troubles In The Sudan and Somalia : Widespread hunger, disease—including AIDS at an epidemic level—ongoing civil war and government corruption. In short, the perfect stew for disaster. The Sudan and Somalia , two political hotspots on the African continent, will have to be dealt with eventually. Throw in pirates and training camps for terrorists and you can figure out why AFCOM is serving as the Africa-based version of PNAC. Expect things to worsen before they get better. Armold Schwarzenegger’s Inept Administration: Star-struck Californians now rue the day when they voted Gray Davis out of office. Arnold Schwarzenegger came into office touting himself as a bridge-builder, but has turned out to be anything but. Because of he and his fellow Republicans’ pledge not to raise taxes, California has a budget crisis like no other and is teetering on bankruptcy. Schwarzenegger is the foreman of the construction crew that erected California ’s financial house of straw. He strong-armed State legislators into closing the 25-billion budget deficit with smoke and mirrors, which will leave the next head of state with a deficit that some estimate will be nearly 45 billion dollars or higher. California will need a federal bailout, which State Attorney General Jerry Brown advocated. He insisted that California could repay t he money within five years with interest. Democrats insist that taxes must be raised. Instead, Arnold and his crew raid the county coffers and slash programs that largely impact upon the poor. Automobile registration fees have risen, while at the same time in-home health care programs have been cut. The state’s portion of Social Security payments has been reduced, creating even tougher times for the state’s disabled and indigent. Drug diversion and prison alternative programs (in a state where the penal system is at 185% of capacity) have seen their budgets slashed by half, if not eliminated. (The State Court of Appeals recently overturned these cuts.) The GOP has also backed Arnold ’s cuts in education—including slashing college grants, K-12 funding and Special Education program. Look for more cuts in 2010-11. The Economic Meltdown: Everyone claims to have seen it coming, yet they turned a blind eye to it, trying to make “One more dollar…just one more dollar…” And when the bubble burst, it was heard around the world. Those who actually saw it coming, bailed out from the fiery planes with golden parachutes and landed on a soft haystack of stock options. Meanwhile everyday Joe’s lost their jobs, benefits and even their pensions. The Bush Administration left the nation bleeding from the rectal cavity with economic policies that would do a prison sodomite proud. You’d think the GOP would have learned the first time around that when you cut taxes, there is turmoil; there is no such thing as “trickle down.” (see REAGAN, BUSH YEARS, The). In this decade, corporate execs wear their greed like military medals. Lehman Brothers, Countrywide, Tyco (two convicted esecs and bilked shareholders), Enron, etc. Mismanagement that resulted in their former employees and the American taxpayers paying the cost. We saw corporate greed at its worst, led by the Hardest Jerking Man In Business, Ken Lay, and the GFOS (God Father Of Scams), Bernie Madoff. There were colossal losses on Wall Street, home prices that nosedived—putting a third of California homeowners underwater (where their mortgage exceeds the value of their homes), foreclosures, massive job losses and the American Automobile Industry—once the envy of the world—coming to Congress to panhandle. Meanwhile, CEOs were being paid hundreds of millions of dollars for running companies into the ground. The Stimulus Package that followed seems to have stabilized the economy, but jobs are not being created as the President promised. The Death of Michael Jackson: Not like I was ever a big fan of his, but this story shows the dual nature of the media. When he was alive, Michael was known for his weirdness. The media dubbed him “Whack-O Jacko.” Because of accusations of child molestation, he became a pariah. Whether or not the molestation claims were true, it was assumed they were. The day he died, it all changed. The media focused on the motion that he was the World’s Greatest Entertainer. He became a tragic, misunderstood figure. This is what American celebrity has become—fodder for tabloids that take liberties wioth your life story, then you die. If you’re lucky, someone just might remember that you had talent. This past decade is one where superficiality was rewarded and brought us pseudo-celebs and marginally talented individuals such as Paris Hilton, Levi Johnston, Nicole Richie, Joe The Plumber, “Nw York”, The Octo-Mom, The Gosselins, Ann Coulter, Omarosa, Andy Dick and Lindsay Lohan. Some of the most hyped stories turned out to mean nothing: The Beer Summit, The “Ascension” of Sarah Palin, The Death of Saddam Hussein, The “Hunt” for Osama Bin-Ladin, The Tea Party and Birther Movements, Rudy Giuliani being a political force, Joe The Plumber, Twitter, Nassholes (NASA) wanting to return to the moon, Tiger Woods…We sure wasted a lot of time. ------------ About the author: Timothy N. Stelly is a poet, essayist, novelist and screenwriter from northern California. His novel, HUMAN TRIAL, is the first part of a sci-fi trilogy and is available from Amazon.com, allthingsthatmatterpress.com and in e-book format at mobipocket.com. HUMAN TRIAL II: ADAM’S WAR is pending review and editing. Stelly also has a short story included in the AIDS-themed anthology, THE SHATTERED GLASS EFFECT, due out in February 2010. His story, SNAKES IN THE GRASS, Is a tale of love, betrayal and its deadly consequences. Reviews of HUMAN TRIAL can be read at amazon.com Visit me at: http://www.myspace.com/pittwit website: http://www.stellyhumantrial.com Email: stellbread@yahoo.com 
Tell a friend about this site!------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
||||||
|
|
|||||||
|
