I have long subscribed to the Carvillian philosophy that "It's the economy, you stupid douchebag" [sic].  And if what's good for web traffic is good for America, then Sarah Palin is great for America.  The "Unique Visitor" stats to popular websites more than doubled* in the month A.S. (After Sarah).  Drudge also more than doubled its traffic while Huffington Post nearly tripled theirs.  In case you haven't heard, the internet is the future.

*Hat tip to the search phrase "palin porn"

But we must not stop now.  The web cannot take eight years of President Obama's rambling facty speeches, and his solutions to problems.  But imagine what just one term of a Palin/McCain administration would bring!  We have:

·         Bristol's water breaks, Candle Trek is born

·         Levi disappears

·         Willow's unavoidable teen infatuation with all things Goth

·         More Troopergate

·         John McCain's descent into madness

·         Cuntgate

·         Willow farts at the G-8 kids table

·         Track's accidental "friendly fire" incident

·         Piper's first period

·         John McCain disappears

·         Sarah assumes the presidency

·         Willow cuts herself at the White House Easter Egg Roll

·         Levi spotted in Mexico

·         John McCain is found in the White House kitchen, confessing the offensive lineup of the Washington Redskins to W.H. sous-chef

·         Vice-President Kristol

·         "The events of April 21st"

·         Pre-emptive war with TBD

·         Bristol photographed snorting coke off Brandon Davis's backfat

·         Levi caught, extradicted to US

·         Todd's drunk attack on a caged polar bear

·         Time Person of the Year: A rape-baby

·         Trig

·         Levi caught with Willow (third base)

·         Palin's first trip to Europe

·         Palin calms US-Russian relations by breast feeding Vladimir Putin

·         First, Second, Third, and Fourth Annual U.S. Book Burning

·         Deficit eliminated by selling Alaska back to Russia on eBay

·         Willow's water breaks, Poster Tock is born

·         Cindy McCain's reality show debuts #1 on VH-1

And that's just 2009!  I therefore change my mind... It is without hesitation that I now endorse the Palin/McCain ticket for President.

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