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Sept. 7, 2007 I feel eerie when I don't write for a while. It's been a few days. I was attempting to write a play, however I wasn't too happy with the way it was going. I dropped it too, to start sometime later. I had not been working out since a few days. I had not been eating well since a few days. I had not been paying attention to my inner self for a few days. Am I brooding a sick self? One thing I have come to terms with is that sickness always sitting around to grab the vulnerable ones. The irony however is that the young are the least vulnerable. Reason, 'healthy mind, healthy body.' Middle age, 'trash'. How do we manage to make ourselves so weak in constitution? All dark forces seem to be attacking at the same time. Most of us can't even resist a nervous break down or the influence of strong opinions against things. A judgmental mind, how healthy is that? Sit and wait, for what? For better times? For fortunes to change themselves? What is fortune? A better job? A bigger apartment? A car that is more expensive? Where do I see a trace of happiness in all this? A bigger problem in today's life is that every human is sitting on another like the big jigsaw puzzle snapped at ten other corners. Every human's life is dependant on so many others. Emotions, happiness have become something of measure. For instance questions: How happy are you? How sad are you? How jubilant are you? Is there a measure? What am I measuring against? Myself? And even a bigger problem is the standardization of feelings. I would say that the advent movies, community gatherings and collective feelings have led man to a landmark that has standardized feelings. A man is now forced to classify his feelings amongst the few options available and then feel the repercussions. Another understanding that I have of myself now is that I don't want to know about a human being too much. It always comes down to the basic darkness that the material existence shares. It's too disappointing. When I see myself sinking in the darkness too, I find it too threatening, and end up being unhappy with myself. I like a world a little away from everybody, or at least live amongst people whose eyes reflect the lights from the sun. I like being amongst people who are not cynical and truthful to themselves and all the life support system that is keeping him alive. ------------ About the author: Shubham is a globe-trotter who has lived in lots of places. He graduated from Vanderbilt University, in Nashville, TN, and worked on Wall Street, in NYC. Now he is into the outdoors as a profession, truly crazy about nature, wilderness and the mountains. His upcoming book Glian, the Son of Nature will be seen in stores soon. He can be checked out here. He is very fond of classic literature, the likes of Charles Dickens, Ruskin Bond, John Steinbeck, and Jack Kerouac. He bears a special regard for simplicity, nevertheless, he equally adores the works of James Joyce. Email: basushubham@gmail.com Comment on this article here! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com. Please link to this article rather than copying and pasting it onto your site (which would be unauthorized and illegal). |
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