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July 24, 2007 There are differences between men and women other than the obvious physical differences. One of the biggest differences is the way we share information, and this probably causes the most trouble in our relationships. According to studies, women use something on the order of 3 times as many words -- in any given day -- than a man does. Allow me to explain with an example. A guy can run across his best friend from high school, whom he hasn’t seen in over a decade. The conversation will go something like this. “Hey Bob, long time no see. How have you been?” "John! Yeah, it’s been a long time. Well, I’ve gotten married and I now have 3 kids. How about you?" “I’ve got 2 kids and I just started a new job.” “That’s great. Listen, I’ve got to get home. Have to prepare for a meeting tomorrow morning. Been great seeing you again.” “Likewise, see you soon.” Both guys will return home, inform their wives that they ran across their best friend since high school, and will be asked “Well, where does he live? Where does he work? What’s his wife’s name and what has he been doing?” The guys will not know how to answer these questions, and will be completely baffled as to why this is important information. Space prevents me from supplying the same dialog from two women under the same circumstances; however, it would suffice to say that CIA intelligence dossiers would pale in comparison to the depth of detail provided. These differences in behavior become apparent during high school and continue throughout life. Guys will return home from school, watch some TV while having a snack, head over to a friend's house, and either play some sports, watch some more TV, or plan ways to get into trouble. As an adult, a guy will decide that the incoming phone call is not important, and let the answering machine get it. Girls, upon returning from school, will instantly trample the family dog in an effort to get to the phone to call their best friend to find out what has happened since school got out. A woman will even answer the phone and have a 20-minute conversation with a telemarketer--assuming that it’s another woman. I became aware that the information gap was much larger then I initially thought when I told my wife about one of my co-workers. I knew his name, where he was from, and the fact he and his wife had four children. In my mind, I had sufficient information. He, his wife, and their children, attended our daughter’s 1st birthday party. During the course of the birthday party, my wife, during a conversation with his wife, came away with how long they had been married, her name, the kids' names and birthdays, when they were married, and other details that never occurred to me to ask for. In my defense, I had only known him for five months. I think this is also reflected in what are called two of America's greatest pastimes: football and baseball. Football pretty much boils down to 3 attempts to move a ball 10 yards. If you succeed, you get to do it again, and if you fail, you have to give the other team a chance. The important detail is that the team only has 25 seconds to decide how to accomplish this task, which doesn’t leave a lot of room for chit-chat, plus the fact only one guy gets to talk. In baseball, most conversation is between the pitcher and catcher, with the rest of the team content to remain quiet. Next time you watch a baseball game, watch the dugout. Fifteen guys all sitting around and not one of them talking to each other. Is it any wonder why most women fail to appreciate either of these games? ![]() If the women would have invented these games, then there would be an indefinite amount of time between football plays, so the women could actually have a conversation, find out how each other is feeling, and possibly make comments on how the other team is dressed. If a woman invented baseball, there would be team meetings between pitches, and in the dugout, there would be chairs and tables so they could find out more about each other. Women will take a girls' night out, talking to each other, exchanging information, and learning more about each other. Men will go out with the guys, drink lots of alcohol, argue about sports and work, and the only information they come back with is that Tim makes strange noises when he throws up. Both men and women will generally feel that they now know a lot more about their friends. So ladies, the next time you feel that your significant other doesn’t share his feelings with you, imagine the following scenario. Thousands of years ago, a group of twenty cavemen go out to hunt, and three days later, ten return with a gopher. As the questions start to fly, one of them explains “We were hunting.” He then turns and goes to his cave, scratching himself. In his mind all of the details have been provided. Soon thereafter, he and his cave-woman are in front of the tribal elder and she complains, “Gog never talk to me.” ------------ About the author: Tracey Stevens is a longtime contributor of Useless-Knowledge. Email: phoque62@hotmail.com Comment on this article here! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com. Please link to this article rather than copying and pasting it onto your site (which would be unauthorized and illegal). |
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