Paris

Articles

Paris

By Brian Michael Barbeito
Nov. 22, 2006

‘ I made up a saying.’

‘ What is the saying?’

‘ I forgot it. It was about money though.’

‘ I’d like some money.’

‘ Me too. It opens doors. It changes everything. Cyndi Lauper sang a song saying so. Cyndi Lauper, with her bleached blonde hair. She probably has money, too.’

‘ She’s probably rich.’

‘ Lets go to Paris.’

‘ I wouldn’t want to go to Paris.’

‘ Neither would I. I was just saying that. It sounded like something to say.’

‘ I’d like to go to Arizona.’

‘ I’ve never been to Arizona.’

‘ You might like it.’

‘ I might. I’d not like to go to Paris. They are probably just dumb or something. Besides, they’d be so French. French is dumb, don’t you think?’

‘ Je ne sais pas.’

‘ Well I think its dumb. Over rated. I don’t like culture, or that sort of thing. Paris would be a waste of time, its too much ego.’

‘ I’d like to go to Arizona.’

‘ No kidding. You always say that. You said that a second ago.’

‘ If I had some money I’d go there.’

‘ If I had some money I’d get drunk for some reason. I’d also want to go to the Greek islands. They are supposed to be all the rage. And India for some reason, but maybe not.’

‘ I’d never go to India.’

‘ Its supposed to be the spiritual center of the world.’

‘ Whatever.’

‘ If you had enough money, it wouldn’t matter much where you went. If you can just take your friends into a restaurant at lunchtime and tell them to order whatever they want, it would brighten any place. People look at you with different eyes when you have money. One time, I had to get these buttons put on a pair of pants, so that some suspenders I had could go on them. I was in a store, and there were two tailors there. It was a Friday afternoon, late. They took some measurements or something. Then they told me it couldn’t be done until Monday or Tuesday, as there wasn’t time. I told them, I actually said, that money was no object, and that I needed them right way. What I had meant was that I’d pay a little extra, to get them done, but by their expressions I could see right away that they thought I meant I’d pay whatever price they asked. Do you know what happened?’

‘ They did them right away.’

‘ They did, and I was suddenly their good friend. Funny thing was, they didn’t charge any extra. Same price.’

‘ They wanted you to come back again.’

‘ Whatever the case, it worked out well. I’d like to go on a cruise ship. I’ve been on one before, but I’d like to again. I liked the islands they went to.’

‘ I’d not be interested in a cruise.’

‘ You’re picky.’

‘ I know.’

‘ I remembered my saying I invented.’

‘ Go ahead.’

‘ Well, its part of another saying, and I have added on.’

‘ You take so long, it’s like a story.’

‘ Okay. They say money can’t buy happiness. I say, try me.’

‘ Ya.’

‘ Did you buy a lottery ticket?'

‘ I forgot.’

‘ Oh well. I didn’t want to go to Paris anyway. Nothing good would come of it. France is probably dumb. Surely its boring, all hype.’

‘ Ya, I’d not go there in a million years.’

‘ Its settled then.’

‘ What’s settled?’

‘ We’re not going to Paris.’

‘ Sounds good.’

‘ Ya, Paris is for Parisians, not for me. I’m just a Catholic kid from the suburbs. I have no business there. Its for someone else.’

‘ You’re a loon.’

‘ I know.’

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Email Brian Michael Barbeito: Brian1750@Hotmail.com

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