HOME | POLITICS | SPORTS | LIFE | SCI/TECH | OPEDS | HELPFUL TIPS
|
Nov. 21, 2006 ‘ I never read a book in my life. I have a virgin mind. I never polluted my mind with anything.’ ‘ I’m not saying anything. I never said a word.’ ‘ I don’t even have a mind. I don’t know about any of those things. Fifty-one percent of the world has to work. The others can talk. I don’t bother talking. Talking is just talking.’ ‘ I don’t talk much.’ ‘ I know. You just grunt. I can’t see you. When I look at you, I don’t know anything about you. I just see your beard. And you are big, heavy. I think there is a part of your stomach that the chip truck missed. I see a small gap in the bulk. You better go catch the chip truck.’ ‘ I like being big. I’m not that big anyhow.’ ‘ You must weigh two hundred and eighty pounds. Whattya weigh, two seventy?’ ‘ I don’t know.’ ‘ Anyway, nothing can change the laws of the Newton.’ ‘ Newton?’ ‘ Newton. Newton said there are laws. Or someone like that. Those laws are the laws. People can say what they want. If I drop something, where does it go? It falls to the floor. It doesn’t take a dummy to figure that out. What are you, a dummy? Didn’t they teach that in school, or do they teach something else? And another thing, there are no more resources than there are, meaning there is a certain amount of dirt, water, oil, minerals. You can shuffle them around, change them around forever and ever. There is no more coming. What do you think happens when you wipe your ass?’ ‘ Huh?’ ‘ You flush the toilet. It goes away. Where do you think it goes? You think it goes to crap land, that the shit fairy comes and takes it away?’ ‘ It goes to a treatment plant of some sort, or something like that.’ ‘ Where do you think water comes from?’ ‘ Lakes and oceans?’ ‘ Ya. And how do you think the water gets to your house? You think the water fairy brings it? It goes through pipes.’ ‘ What does any of this have to do with anything?’ ‘ It doesn’t. It’s just the way it is. The sun is going to explode one day. Then none of this will matter anyway.’ ‘ The sun is going to explode?’ ‘ Ya dummy, the sun. You know the big thing in the sky? Did you think it was a light bulb or something? Did you ever wonder why it was light in the day?’ ‘ Ya. The sun.’ ‘ I don’t make mistakes. If I made em’, I fix em’. I never met anyone as perfect as myself. People don’t want to work. That is the problem. Nobody wants to work. Me, I work. I don’t have time for movies. Do you know how many movies that are in the world? Stupid. North Dallas Forty, now that was a movie. That is the only movie I ever saw. Did you see North Dallas Forty? You should watch that movie. That’s probably the best movie, North Dallas Forty, with Nick Nolte, and it shows the way it is. Do they still have that movie? Me, I’m not afraid of anything. There is only one thing I am afraid of, only one thing. If I was surrounded in an alley by four or six black guys.’ ‘ Four black guys, eh?’ ‘ Ya. If you are in that situation, you better be a fast runner. And also, take care of your teeth, don’t forget to take care of your teeth. I never took care of my teeth, and now I have no teeth left. I wish I had taken care of my teeth.’ ‘ I try to take care of my teeth. I have good teeth.’ ‘ All my mouth is full of fake teeth, caps, fillings, root canals. I don’t have much time left. I already did my life, and I did it properly. I do things properly. I do it like I mean it. You have to have the eye of the tiger. I never pushed you to become anything, and that’s what you became…nothing. I never had a panic attack in my life. I don’t know what that is. I don’t have time for panic attacks. I’ve never been depressed about anything. What do you got again? Don’t you got something? Schitzo. You schitzo or something? Or autism. You got autism?’ ‘ No actually.’ ‘ I’m not an intellect, either. I don’t know any intellects. I never went to school. I went to grade nine, and I went inside when it was raining out. I stayed in the parking lot. If it rained, I went in. Then they asked me to leave after that year. You know, there were lots of fights then, all the time. A guy fought a guy, and then when one guy fell down the fight was over. You didn’t kick a guy when he was down. That wasn’t done. Ya, sometimes someone had a chain, but you could bring a chain too, or even a knife. But nobody shot anyone. That’s stupid. That’s for cowards. We fought lots of guys I remember. In the eight grade I fought a guy. I was getting ready to fight him, and as I was taking off my jacket he sucker punched me in the jaw and I went down and it was over. But even that, you never would have ten guys jump on one guy. There were rules. And look at me. I did fine. Look at everything I got. I never been afraid of anything in my life. I just chew it up and spit it out and ask for more. I do it like I mean it.’ ‘ You got lots.’ ‘ And if you ever see that North Dallas Forty movie, get it. I’ll pay you for it.’ ‘ If I see it around, I’ll get it.’ ‘ That was a good movie. North Dallas Forty.’ ------------ Email Brian Michael Barbeito: Brian1750@Hotmail.com Comment on this article here! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
||||||
|
|
|||||||
|
