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Feb. 1, 2006 Vacation is supposed to be a time for relaxation and rejuvenation; a time to reconnect with self and spouse, and remember what it is that makes both so great; a time to get out and go have fun. Okay, so I got out and had fun on my vacation. But I have to admit, I got a little antsy going a whole week without doing any writing. I’m willing to bet I’ll be ready to chuck my keyboard by the end of the week, after I’ve settled back in to the daily routine. Just because I wasn’t writing, though, didn’t mean I wasn’t busy, or thinking about things to write. Now that I’ve got my butt back in front of my computer, I’m ready to vent. 1) Super Bowl XL will either be an interesting, nail-biting thriller or a snooze-inducing blowout. My nails are in need of trimming, but I don’t know if I can hold out until Sunday to start chewing on them. Never fear, my faithful readers, I will have a full analysis of the big game later in the week. 2) Kobe Bryant’s 81-point performance against the Toronto Raptors should never be mentioned in the same breath as Wilt Chamberlain’s 100-point night back in 1962, David Thompson’s 73-point effort in 1978 or Elgin Baylor’s 71-point performance in 1961. For starters, Baylor, Chamberlain and Thompson did not have the benefit of the three-point line to help them get their point tallies. And I don’t recall reading anywhere where Baylor, Chamberlain or Thompson ran away teammates and coaches who helped him reach immortality as a basketball player. Someone who has been around a little longer than me—paging Patrick Hurley—might be able to help me out here. Kobe Bryant is a great player on a mediocre team. He’s got exactly what he deserved, and if he never makes another appearance in the NBA Finals, it’ll be too soon. 3) Oprah Winfrey doesn’t get an ounce of sympathy from me over Freygate, the debacle over her support of James Frey’s fictionalized memoir A Million Little Pieces. In addition to investigative work by The Smoking Gun, which brought discrepancies in Frey’s work into the national spotlight, The New York Times reported on January 24—two days prior to Winfrey’s down-dressing of Frey on her daily TV program—that serious questions had been raised about Frey’s memoir at least one month before he was on her program the first time. Edward Wyatt’s article, found at http://www.nytimes.com/2006/01/24/books/24frey.html, indicates that Debra Jay, a former Hazelden counselor who has made several appearances on Oprah told a senior producer on the show in October that Frey’s description of the treatment at the rehab clinic were false. Other former Hazelden employees have also since come forward, claiming that the center’s treatment of its patients adheres to strict guidelines. Though no one could confirm that Frey had been a patient at Hazelden due to confidentiality restrictions, and no one knows for sure if that senior producer informed Ms. Winfrey herself of the factual concerns with Frey’s book, one thing is clear—Oprah Winfrey needs to do a better job of due diligence before publicly backing one of her Book Club selections. If she had done that, she wouldn’t have made a fool of herself on Larry King Live. 4) I should mention that James Frey should not be confused with James N. Frey, who as far as I know has made his writing money honestly. He’s the author of such books as How to Write a Damn Good Novel and How to Write a Damn Good Mystery. Last I heard, James N. Frey has not been hung out to dry on anyone’s talk show. 5) I figured out how Fox News can claim to be “fair and balanced”. If you combine the output of the ultraconservative news channel with the ultraliberal programming over on Fox’s over-the-air mini-net, you actually get a combination that’s fair and balanced. Don’t be surprised if the promos for American Idol or The NFL on Fox start running with the disclaimer “Viewer Discretion Advised” real soon. 6) Speaking of mini-nets, the other two over-the-air mini-nets, UPN and The WB, are merging to form the CW Television Network this coming fall. The deal involves joint ownership of the network by the new CBS Corporation (itself recently spun off from Viacom) and Warner Bros. Entertainment (part of the massive Time Warner empire). Though neither UPN nor The WB was profitable, both offered shows that people enjoyed watching. Some of those programs, including this year’s breakout hit Everybody Hates Chris and veteran shows like Gilmore Girls and Smallville, will survive the merger. Others will fall by the wayside. Don’t be surprised if CBS doesn’t own The CW outright in a few years and give it a new name—CBS Lite. 7) I’m convinced that Orlando is the most dangerous city in America to drive in. It’s a wonderful place to visit, and therein lies the problem. I’ve made several trips to the area in recent years, and I’ve become familiar with the main roads in and around the city. Many people, however, have no clue where they’re going, and as a result road trips tend to be thrill rides. It takes more patience to drive in Orlando than any other big city I’ve driven in, and I live in a big city. 8) On February 1, the Charlotte Bobcats plan to hold Presbyterian Hospital “Get Well Soon” Night when they host the Atlanta Hawks. Fans who bring blank get-well cards to the ticket office will get a two-for-one ticket offer for the game. Injured Bobcats, including rookie Sean May and last year’s Rookie of the Year Emeka Okafor, will then sign the cards and deliver them to Presbyterian’s Hemby Children’s Hospital on February 2. According to team president and COO Ed Tapscott, “Get Well Soon” Night will give the Bobcats a chance to thank the fans for their support and remember the many children who are recovering from illnesses and injuries outside the spotlight. This promotion falls under the categories of Clever and Cool: Clever because it may help put some more butts in the seats at the new arena, and Cool because the team didn’t forget their future fan base. 9) Did I mention that Darrell Mease and Susan Smith are still alive? I can’t be the only one who noticed… ------------ About the author: Claxton Graham has written a number of articles for Useless Knowledge. He works as a business systems analyst. Email: scifiwriter8502@email.com Comment on this article here! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
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