Things You Learn From Working In The Circus

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Things You Learn From Working In The Circus

By Jack Lepiarz
Apr. 15, 2006

These are just a few of the things that I have picked up (very quickly) while working in show business. Some of these lessons came more easily than others. I'll let you guess which ones were easy.

1. ALWAYS ask how old someone is.

2. While we're on the topic of age: 3-year-olds do not make good volunteers.

3. Do not ask your neighbors if their small children can be your volunteers.

4. Before you go up to introduce the next act, make sure that the FIRST act is done.

5. Bullwhips really hurt.

6. Make sure that your knife-throwing board is secure before you throw knives into it, unless, of course, you want it to fall over.

7. Never run with throwing knives.

8. Sleep is great, but don't sleep through your entrance.

9. If somebody hasn't had a smoke all day, you'd do well to give them their space.

10. If you hear a crash and "Ah, s***", it's already too late.

11. Never, ever, ever eat carnival food.

12. Before you accuse the handicapped kid of stealing show props, make sure that your partners didn't give it to him.

13. If you're in the audience and get pulled into the ring by one of the clowns that you know personally, be prepared to leave the ring with absolutely no dignity whatsoever.

14. On that note, trumpets don't work well without mouthpieces.

15. Sometimes, trumpets don't work well WITH mouthpieces.

16. Don't let kids try to balance golf clubs on their chins. Bad things happen.

17. If you get the joy of being stationed near the horse/elephant/llama/yak/camel stables, buy some Glade. Lots of it.

18. The foot massage machine known as "Footsie Wootsie" is God.

19. If it rains, get ready for a long day of diverting water out of your tent via small canals dug out of wood chips and hay.

And, last but not least,

20. When working with a bubble machine, don't stand downwind of the bubbles. Your eyes, nose, and stomach will thank you.

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About the author: Jack Lepiarz is a senior at Madison High School. Born in Waco, Texas, he lived with the Big Apple Circus for much of his early childhood, eventually moving to Madison, New Jersey, where he now resides. Although he is often described as stubborn and egotistical, he tries to keep an open-mind towards new ideas and treat people the way he would like to be treated.

Email: Jackwuzhere42@aol.com

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