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 By Argile Stox Apr. 10, 2006 Once again, I am faced with a blank Microsoft Word Document and a blinking cursor. I really did not want to write an article today – well, it’s not that I didn’t want to write an article, I just had nothing really to say. A few minutes ago I responded an individual on another message board regarding the speech recognition program I am using. Once I placed the headset and microphone on my cranium – I felt that there was some sort of obligation, a sort of pressure for me to write something. There are a lot of issues pressing on my mind which I would like to write about. However, like a freshly mixed bowl of Jell-O –the thoughts on those matters are not really congealed. I can talk about PublishAmerica until I am blue in the face, the immigration problem which is beginning to sound like background noise, the recent television episode of The West Wing, imagine a Latino president and a whole bunch of stuff. Yet, I feel as if I am all talked out and have beaten those subjects into the ground. To be quite honest, there’s really nothing happening here. I am content to sit in the basement – surrounded by technology, search engines, spell checkers, computer tune-up programs, and a television set. I can turn on the television and watch CNN, MSNBC, FOX, or some mindless rerun. It is just one of those days that everything is at my disposal –yet, there is nothing to produce. Actually, I am quite disturbed and angry. I would like to start rewriting and updating my memoir. However, there is one huge roadblock that is in my way. PublishAmerica refuses to terminate my publishing contract unless I sign a gag order. Yet, over the past few weeks –PublishAmerica has been releasing authors like old tennis shoes. The reason that PublishAmerica gives is that the book has not sold any copies in a few royalty check cycles. Okay, I can understand that. However, what really bugs the heck out of me is that the author’s who were released from their publishing contracts, were very happy to be associated with PublishAmerica. They had not one bad word to say about that printing company. The fact that matter is, PublishAmerica claims to have at least 17,000 happy and satisfied authors; and there are a few miniscule amount of authors who are chomping at the bit to be released from their contracts. It just doesn’t make sense! Why would they want to hold onto a memoir that is not selling, and a very unhappy author? On the Barnes & Noble web site, my book does not even have a sales rating. That is because I have not sold a book through them in the past six months. Over at Amazon.com, they have one of my books in stock and my sales ranking today is 2,380,534, as opposed to yesterday when my sales ranking was 2,361,755. Now, before anyone goes: “WOW! Argile, you are selling a lot of books” –let’s get a few things straight. First of all, the higher the sales ranking the least amount of books you have sold. The single book that Amazon has for sale on the web site has been there for the past six months. Now, after the six months has expired my book loses its sales rank on the site. If I was a call up Ingram (PublishAmerica’s) distributor and do a stock check–they would say maybe one or two of my memoir’s are in one or two warehouses. If you were to go on to other bookseller’s websites, you may find that the website boasts that they have 101 copies of my book. Well guess what, 100 stands for the distributor –Ingram. The number “one” stands for how many books they actually have in stock. OK, suppose for instance the mail person places a letter in my mailbox from PublishAmerica which releases me from my publishing contract –I would jump for joy. I would probably jump as high as I did when PublishAmerica first offered me a publishing contract. Is it funny how things that go around, come around. Yet, once I am released from the publishing contract, any of my books that are hanging around warehouses in the United States or the world are not returned to me. If the book has sold the book royalties remain with PublishAmerica due to the fact that I am no longer under contract with them. Well, you win some, and you lose some. Working on the assumption that I have been released for my PublishAmerica of publishing contract, I am free to rewrite my memoir and try to find a literary agent who would represent me and shop my book around to different publishing houses. However, that is putting the cart before the horse. There is still the matter of rewriting a 325 page book. If you want to think about it metaphorically –rewriting a 325 page book is akin to taking a 1941 (any make or model) from a junkyard and rebuilding it in your driveway. There are car enthusiasts who would jump at the chance to restore a classic car. Every spare moment of their time would be spent scouring of the junkyards for parts, buying and subscribing to magazines that sell parts for that car. And once the car is fully restored, they stick the key into ignition and off they go on a joy ride through the neighborhood. It is quite different when you rewrite a 325 page book. A few days ago, I sat down and reread my book from cover to cover. I cannot believe my overuse of comma’s, the sentences that don’t make sense, information and details that were left out, and the update which needs to be included in the memoir. Self doubt is a terrible thing. Realistically, readers are not interested in the subject matter of my book. Who the hell cares about the homeless and their plight to live and survive on the mean streets of the USA? As long as these undesirable individuals are not in your neighborhood –who gives a damn! However, I have seen homeless standing in front of convenience stores trying to sell some shoplifted merchandise to customers, as these individuals were walking into the store. There was one instance where the a clerk took money out of their own pocket and bought food for this homeless person, so that this homeless person would leave the premises and not bother customers who were about to enter the convenience store. The homeless person received sustenance, walked off the premises of the convenience store –problem solved. The homeless person thanked the clerk for the meal, and walked away –not to be seen again. That situation occurred in Rapid City, South Dakota – population about 66,000. That homeless person represented 1/100 of 1% of the homeless population in Rapid City, South Dakota. Imagine if you will that, you’re living in Detroit, Houston/ Dallas Texas, New York City, Philadelphia, Arizona, even Las Vegas and all the other big cities in the United States. You are walking down the street –the first thing that happens is a homeless person approaches you and would ask for is a cigarette. Then, if the homeless person’s stomach is growling for food –that homeless person may ask you for some spare change. If you are driving in your car and you’re stopped at a red light –a homeless person will clean your window and ask you for some spare change. As you are driving along the boulevard of this large city you’ll find homeless individuals holding cardboard placards that scream out: WILL WORK FOR FOOD! However, as many people have seen –the homeless individuals go directly to the liquor store and buy booze, not food, booze. Other homeless individuals may buy drugs. You see the same homeless person, on the same street corner washing windshields of cars. You then see the same homeless person that you gave a cigarette too yesterday, asking other individuals for cigarettes. After a while, these homeless individuals begin to blend into the scenery of the big city. What annoys the hell out of me is the fact that I lived that life for one year. I have written a book that graphically details what I went through as a homeless person living on the streets, living in shelters, sleeping under a plastic garbage can tarp during a rainstorm, in a gully. I have stood in soup lines, I have waded through the bureaucracy trying to get help –and I lived to write about it. But, who the hell cares? It just appears to me that the public believes that all homeless people are mentally ill, drug abusers, alcoholics, and thus, the earth. In actuality, who gives a damn if a guy wrote a book about the homeless? After all, he’s not homeless anymore… So here is the dilemma. If PublishAmerica releases me from my publishing contract and I have the freedom to rewrite my memoir, and it is reproduced in a regular sized paper back book –will anyone want to read it? I mean, look this way –since my memoir has been affiliated with PublishAmerica, I have sold about twenty books. If I was step away from my situation as it stands right now, and envision sitting at a literary agent’s desk with manuscript in hand, and the question is asked, “So, how many books did you sell while you’re memoir was with PublishAmerica?” I would be embarrassed to say. “Oh, about twenty trade paperbacks that had to be ordered from the publisher or bookstore.” Now remember, I have stepped away and I am looking and listening to the conversation that just transpired above. I wonder if the agent would give me back the few chapters that I sent him. Then, I have in my mind that the agent would say "Well if the homeless problem because big news again, I can shop your manuscript around. After all, publishing houses want to be “in the moment,” capture and profit from the public’s interest in this matter.” In my mind, it all depends upon how much faith I have in my writing ability and the subject matter at hand. To look at the situation from a ridiculous point of view, could PublishAmerica be doing me a favor by not releasing me from my publishing contract? Could they, in their infinite wisdom –have already consigned my book to the failure heap, that any sales of my book, few dollars in royalty money is basically a gift, and that I should be thankful that the book is available to be purchased from a web site or ordered from a book seller? What really hurts me deep down is the fact that my memoir wasn’t even given a chance to be exposed the public. Yes, there have been people who have purchased my book through word of mouth and or exposure on this forum. However, the average reader who prowls through the stacks of booksellers offerings will not even see my book on the shelf. In order for my book to be read it has to be recommended by somebody else. However, if there is no “somebody else” to recommend my book –it is as if my book does not exist. That is what the really sad part of being associated with PublishAmerica is. The author hopes and prays that someone will recommend the book to be read by others. I am also aware that my memoir is not the greatest literary work to be created. However, that memoir is an extension of me. It chronicles a point in my life –becoming homeless, and the strong will to stay alive. In the book, you will read where I almost ended it all. The thought that ran through my mind seemed logical at the time. I would’ve been just one more statistic in a body bag –cremated or buried in Potter’s Field. Who the hell would have cared? The mere fact that I sought help and received reinforcement to live has to count for something – right? My life since that experience of homelessness has improved tremendously. If you are an avid reader of U-K, you were aware of how my life has changed. However, I have exchanged places with the memoir. My memoir is homeless. Some would say, “Well, your memoir is like the “Picture of Dorien Gray" by Oscar Wilde.” Here I am; I have a roof over my head (which I am very grateful for), food in refrigerator, and a woman who really loves me. And the other hand, my memoir is searching for a shelf in a home, a table to reside on, or to be housed in a library book stack shelf. The question still remains –if I am released from my PublishAmerica publishing contract will it be worth my while to edit, add new information, and rewrite the memoir? That is the question that begs to be answered each day. On the one hand, I want the rights to my book return to me without any gag order. On the other hand, the book is printed and available to be purchased buy the general public –however, I do not have the funds to market and advertise the book. On the other hand, if the rights to my book on returned to me by PublishAmerica without any strings attached –will I have the intestinal fortitude, energy, and wherewithal to completely rewrite the memoir? On the other hand, if I do all that –will I be able to find a literary agent who will see the potential in my memoir and have it shopped around to other publishing houses. On the other hand, will my health holdout – if my book is discharged from PublishAmerica’s inventories, and will I be able to live to see my book reprinted in a regular paperback format. I do not want to appear morbid here –however, I have had a heart attack, I suffer from high blood pressure, degenerative bone disease, and arthritis. In all honesty, I feel trapped not only by PublishAmerica –I feel trapped by my own life span. It would be wonderful for me to go with great gusto and rewrite my memoir. It would be great if a literary agent would decide to represent me and shop my book around. It would be incredible to see the paperback book shelved in a bookstore, Wal-Mart, Target, or the neighborhood pharmacy. However, everything that I have mentioned above is a dream or some may view it as a fantasy. One must to really live it to understand the euphemisms that are bandied about daily in normal conversation. In my younger years I did not fully understand the sentiments behind a phrase “Between a rock and a hard place,” or Damned if you do - Damned you don’t. Many individuals have advised me to just forget about my memoirs and write something else. I have heard from individuals who have related to the stories about other individuals who failed repeatedly until they became a success. However, I think it is different when you are a writer and compose a manuscript. There is a certain amount of validation when your book is accepted by a well established publishing house. There is no validation when your book is accepted for printing by a reverse vanity book printer. The validation that the author receives is when the individual observers their book on the shelf of a bookstore. There is no validation when the individual observes their book on a web site that contains two or three million books in its inventories. In my mind, the question remains: Should I just forget about my memoir –and cash the $1.57 royalty check –and remain rather blasé about the whole situation? Or should I fight like hell to get the rights to my memoir back from PublishAmerica. This entire affair has taken a toll on my mental as well as my physical health. I’m convinced that if there was a bright spot and potential for my memoir in the marketplace and my book was being read – my physical and mental health would improve significantly. However, the each day that I wake up the heaviness, disappointment, and disdain for my publisher weighs heavily on my mind. Back in 2002 there was not written much about pitfalls of signing with PublishAmerica. What I find completely absurd and hysterical is that individuals who (if they did the simplest of research on PublishAmerica) absorbed any information about PublishAmerica on the net–still submit their work to that company; and then cry bloody murder when their book sells only to friends, relatives and acquaintances – and not to the average book buying public. Honestly, I have quit reading all the horror stories that are on message boards about PublishAmerica. Everything that is being written now about PublishAmerica is just a rehash of what was written about PublishAmerica one to two years ago. The situation that also drives me crazy is that PublishAmerica was exposed as a scam operation when they lost an arbitration suit brought forth by one of their own authors. PublishAmerica paid an undisclosed amount of money to the author, paid all court costs, paid all reimbursements, and they are still operating their publishing scam operation as if nothing happened. I don’t know, maybe I’m missing something. However, if an organization, business, manufacturer, publisher is found guilty of inappropriate business practices –how can they still remain in business and be given a favorable recommendation by the Better Business organization in Frederick, Maryland? I understand that justice is blind – the statue of the blindfolded woman clearly shows that she is able to hear! Oh, wait a minute – in Frederick, Maryland – justice must be deaf as well. As I stated in the beginning of this article, I really had nothing to write about. However, writing is a catharsis which helps me through the day. In all honesty, I do not obsess about this PublishAmerica thing, every day. However, sometimes I look at my book and I wonder if I should have written it. I also wonder if I should’ve submitted it to be printed but PublishAmerica. After all, if I had written the memoir and did not submit to PublishAmerica –I would have nothing to b!tch about. What’s worse, doing or not doing? “To be or not to be, that is the question…..” ------------ Email Argile Stox: argilestox@gmail.com Comment on this article here! ------------ All articles are EXCLUSIVE to Useless-Knowledge.com and are not allowed to be posted on other websites. ARTICLE THIEVES WILL BE PROSECUTED! |
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